Type Of Story: Shane Dawson
Author: peachteaphan
Story Rating Estimation: PG-13
Reads: 9.1K
Votes: 465
Comments: ...
Description: So he's gone...all because.... of me. There's no more time together... I did this... this is my fault...I shouldn't of.. but I had to..Let's face it..I'm...Alone.
Suggested If: you want to read a Shane Dawson fic (I've never reviewed one before now)
My Review: The plot is...clichè, and the ending is pretty terrible. I'm not just saying that because he dies, but like...he kills himself just because they fucking broke up. That's pretty fucking pathetic. Plus the plot overall jumps around a lot. I like your chapter lengths, but your grammar and spelling needs a lot of work. When you want to write dialogue, you write it "like this" NOT like:this, even if it's a Full conversation. Your sentences were pretty choppy and you need to learn the differences between your/you're and there/their/they're. Your=shows possession (is that your cat?), you're=you are something (you're late!), there=a place (I'm going over there), their=shows plural possession (that's their house), they're=they are something (they're dating!). Overall, the plot needs work and so does your grammar and spelling...congrats on completing it though.
Note to Author: It needs a lot of revision
Rating (1-5): 0.5
Other Note: I stumbled upon your story through the Wattpad reading lists and decided to review it :)
ESTÁS LEYENDO
(More) Fanfic Reviews
De TodoFanfic Reviews part 2 I am also open to reading non-fanfiction!
