1)
Aelin: Buzzard?
Rowan: Yes, dear?
Aelin: So I have this new friend, Feyre. She's pretty cool. Informative. She knows a lot. Smart bulb, that one.
Rowan: Alright..?
Aelin: *smiles innocently* Could you just shift for me? Just for a second? Please? *pouts*
Rowan: *suspicious* Okay...*shifts*
Aelin: *immediately holds him still and whips out a measuring tape* *measures wingspan* YES! YES! FEYRE! GODDAMNIT YOU BITCH COME HERE! I WIN! I WIN!
Feyre: *sighs* Why am I friends with her?
2)
Dorian: I sleep with a dagger under my pillow.
Chaol: A dagger? I sleep with a full-on sword.
Aedion: I sleep with Wyrdmarks guarding the door!
Aelin: Well, I sleep with Rowan, so...
3)
The Queen of Terrasen is so sassy...
Maeve: A blood oath is eternal.
Aelin: I don't care. Free him.
4)
Rowan and Aelin sharing a bed ft. Fleetfoot
Fleetfoot: *snuggles between them*
Rowan: Aelin this furry abomination is taking up all the space
Aelin: You're taking up all the space. Deal with it. *mumbles and kicks him*
Rowan: *glares hatefully at cuddly puppy*
Fleetfoot: *licks Rowan's face playfully*
Rowan: AELIN IT LICKED ME
5)
Basically Rowan
I may seem like an asshole...
But deep down I'm a good person
And deeper down I'm an even bigger asshole
6)
Lysandra: Aelin, did you eat all the chocolate?
Aelin: Most of the time I'm lying, but this time I'm telling the truth. I didn't.
Lysandra: Then who did?
Rowan: *enters room* Hey you two.
Aelin: Rowan, why is there a chocolate stain on—
Aelin: YOU ATE THE CHOCOLATE! YOU ATE THE CHOCOLATE!
Lysandra: *rolling on floor laughing*
7)
*After Rowan is crowned king*
Evangeline: So...are we supposed to call Rowan His Majesty now?
Aelin: No. You don't.
Evangeline: But why? Wouldn't that be disrespectful?
Aelin: We're like rule breakers here.
Evangeline: Well, I don't mind THAT. Just...people will judge.
Aelin: They can go to hell.
Evangeline: Then what of Rowan?
Aelin: *smirks* I'm not saying we don't need to address him as "Your Majesty" because of the informality we use in our court. I'm saying that because it's just a title, and all my mate does is spar, look puffed up and pretty, and get his grumpy feathers ruffled.
Evangeline: Bwahahahahahah.
8)
Aedion: *minding his own business*
Aelin: *humming while reading near him on the couch*
Rowan: *walks in*
Aelin: *stares at Rowan*
Rowan: *stares at Aelin*
Aedion: *grabs brandy*
Rowan: ...
Aelin: ...
Rowan: ...
Aelin: ...
Aedion: *drinks heavily*
Rowan: *eyes glint at something because silent conversations*
Aelin: *sultry purr*
Aedion: *drains the bottle, reaches for another*
YOU ARE READING
SJM: Post
HumorThe title is self-explanatory. A collection of opinions, rants, jokes, posts, fanart and fan music on the series Throne of Glass and A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Maas. This is uncensored and contains a lot of idiotic humor, which can be...
