Taking Command Book 2 (Kylux)

Chapter 32: Final Betrayal

Kylo PoV

Hux had saved me. He had saved my life. If anything, it made me feel more guilty for having second thoughts. I did not know what to do, and I had no idea how to feel. It felt like I was being torn in two. Part of me wanted to stay with the First Order. Through it all, I still wanted to remake the galaxy in Vader's image. I wanted to bring order. On the other hand, my grandfather, the man who had eventually become Vader, had appeared to me. He had told me to turn from the path I was on.

But was it too late? I had killed everyone who had once meant anything to me. All of the people I had once trained with were now dead as well. I had nothing to go back to. I had no illusions about how I would be treated should I return back to the people I had so viciously betrayed. It was too late.

After some very intense sessions in a bacta tank, I was able to walk around and do my duties. Hux was preparing to formally declare war on the Republic. He had declared himself the new Emperor. I was happy for him, I truly was. No one knew better than I how hard he had worked to gain this position. He had done it all out of a desire to bring order. He had had no sentimental reasons such as I had had.

I found him about a day after I was out of the medic center. He was working out in the gym, having discarded his usual great coat. He was shirtless with his typical loose, baggy pants. He was busy doing push-ups on the floor at the moment.

"Am I interrupting?" I asked as I walked into the room.

He immediately jumped up and ran over to me. "So you're better?" He asked. I could sense his joy and relief. I felt so bad. I wanted, with all of my heart, to just go along with whatever he did. But I had to honor the memories of the people I had hurt.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Listen, we... We need to talk." I winced a little bit inside as I watched the blood drain from Hux's already naturally pale face.

"About what, Ky?" He asked my quietly, putting his arms around me.

"About what we are doing. Are we sure it's the right thing?" I asked him hesitantly. I had to know how truly dedicated he was to this. I already knew the answer, but I wanted to hear him say it.

"I am sure. I believe that the galaxy needs to be restored to the way it was during the Empire. After the Empire fell, the galaxy fell into chaos. The Republic shelters traitors now, and we are on the verge of a war. This is unacceptable. Something needs to change, and I want to be the man who brings the change. If I must bring war, I will. I would rather get the Republic to surrender peaceably, but I doubt that they will." He sighed a little bit. "Why do you ask?" He asked warily, looking at me cautiously.

"I've been... Thinking. When I was out there, I saw someone. I saw the spirit of Darth Vader appear to me in the snow. Only, it wasn't Darth Vader, it was Anakin Skywalker, the man he was before he was Vader. Anakin -my grandfather- warned me not to go down this path. He said that it had only caused him pain. I don't want to be in pain." I said honestly. "I trust what he said, and I don't want to cause any more harm than I already have."

"Harm?!" I could sense the incredulous tone in my husband's voice. "You've killed those who would stand in our way. And keep in mind, your parents came to us, not the other way around. You've helped me more than anyone else. Whatever you saw out there, it was not real. You were hallucinating. I don't know what's happening with you, but you need to snap out of it, for both of our sake." He looked torn between anger and sadness. "You pledged yourself to me, and before that, you pledged yourself to the First Order. I love you with all of my heart, but if you betray me and my men, be assured that I will kill you."

He kissed me on the cheek, and then he left me alone in the training room. I had to make a choice, and I did not know if I had the strength to do the right thing. Betrayal or loyalty? Either would be wrong. If I betrayed Hux, I would betray everything I promised him on our wedding day. If I stayed with him and the First Order, I would be betraying the memory of my family. No matter how I did it, I would betray someone. This is where my path had taken me. I was so far down that now, whatever happened, I would be hurting someone or something.