The last hunt had taken everything out of you. You had nearly gotten killed by a Ghoul. You had watched those things rip your parents to shreds when you were 7. At the time you didn't understand what was happening you just ran and ran. That's when you stumbled upon a woman named Ellen Harvelle. She had a little girl named Jo, you girls both got a long. They had come to know your story and that's when the Winchesters stumbled in. Dean took an instant liking to Jo. You on the other hand took a certain liking to Sam. He was cute and by far adorable..but you knew better than to try and flirt. You were in no condition for a relationship. Yes you were a damn good Hunter but that didn't mean you didn't have breakdowns or anything.
Jo was normally the one to calm you down from hunts but you lost her and Ellen five years ago. Jo got hit by a hellhound. Ellen stayed behind with Jo. You were going to stay too but Ellen made Dean promise to drag you out. Sam ended up grabbing you and carrying you out while Dean said bye to Jo. You remember screaming and saying you hated everyone.
Shaking your thoughts away you try and enjoy the rest of your shower. Granted you chose to stay in a different room, Dean had managed to get a conjoined room so you all could talk if needed. After finishing in the shower you dry off and that's when you lay eyes on the one scar you had from your childhood. You hated yourself... You had more scars now. You needed to wrap your freshest wounds. Sam stitched you up this time when you got back. Your mind was bouncing back to everything.. If the boys hasn't gotten to you on time you would have really does the same way your parents did.
It was an accident. You had gotten separated from the boys. You were the only one small enough to crawl through the airway vent. Neither of the boys liked it but you decided what the hell was the worst that could happen. Boy were you wrong. Pulling on pajamas you sigh. Walking out of your bathroom you knock on the door between the rooms. Sam opens it and finds you.
"Check the stitches and wrap them for me?" You ask soft.
"Of course." Sam nods. He lets you sit on his bed while he checks the stitches and then wraps them gently. When he's finished he smiles at you soft.
"Thank you.. I, uh think I'm going to turn in a little early."
"Okay, get some rest (y/n)." Sam says soft. You thank him once more and are off to your room.
You turn on the and watch re-runs of some random show. You try to sleep but you can't. Around midnight you slip a little but are up by 2:30 in the morning sobbing. Everything hit you hard.. everything you had been bottling up. You just break. You don't remember hearing the door open at all. You feel arms around you as the sobs are breaking from your chest.
"Shush, it's alright I've got you sweetheart." Sam says softly kissing your forehead. You can't seem to stop the noises coming from you and before long you are having troubles breathing."slow your breathing sweetheart. Come on. Breath in with me, breath out sweetie."
"I-I-I can't." You sob.
"Come on I know what will help." Sam says picking you up softly. You cling to him with a death grip. He shuts the bathroom door behind him and goes to set you down but you don't let go. Sam chuckles a little and kisses your temple. "It's okay baby." He starts the shower and doesn't even care about clothes. He takes you in and sits on the floor of the tub. The warm water cascading down on you both. Eventually your hyperventilating slows down completely. Sam continues to rub your back the best he could through the wet clothes. Eventually your breathing is normal. Sam's hand finds your face softly. You don't look up and he makes you softly. "Don't hide from me beautiful, it's okay."
"Why are you being so nice to me?" You whisper.
"Come here." Sam says softly pulling you onto his lap. You wrap your arms around him and Sam kisses your forehead. "Let's get you some dry clothes."
"All I have left is dirty." You sigh.
"I've got you. Stay right here, I promise I'll be right back." You look up at him and Sam kisses your lips softly. You stand there shocked as he steals off to his motel room.
"Sam why are you soaked?" Dean questions.
"It's nothing." Sam responds grabbing some clothes. "I'm staying in her room tonight."
"Finally admitted feelings? Good for you Sammy." Dean grins.
"Shut up." Sam rolls his eyes and heads back over to you. He finds you in the bathroom. He helps you out of the wet clothes and dries you with one of the towels. You shiver a little and he hands you one of his shirts. You take it and pull it on. You don't bother with pants. Sam pulls off his wet shirt and you dry him off. His heartbeat picking up. When you finish he pulls on some dry sweatpants. You go to the bed with Sam following behind you. You crawl into the bed and Sam crawls in with you. He pulls you to him and you snuggle up to him.
"Thank you Sammy." You say softly into his chest.
"You are welcome sweetheart." Sam says softly kissing the top of your head.
"Sam?" You mumble again.
"Hmm baby?" He asks.
"I love you." You say soft. Sam moves a little and you think you've said the wrong thing. Sam moves so you are under him and he can see your face.
"I love you too (y/n)." He kisses you softly. You smile and snuggle into him again. Sam laughs soft and holds you close. "Sleep baby, no more nightmares I've got you."
