Normal is Overrated (Joke and Funnies Book)

40 Things to do in Walmart

1. Challenge random costumers to duels with rolls or wrapping paper.

2. Ride a display bike around the entire store and when asked to get off say you were just taking it for a test drive.

3. Randomly throw things over into neighboring isles.

4. Have silly string wars with your friends and the not expecting costumers.

5. Stand by the mannequin and try to stay completely still then when someone walks by and then yell at them.

6. Take shopping carts and fill them completely just to leave them stranded in strategic locations.

7. Ride the little electronic car rides in front of the store.

8. Contaminate the entire auto-department, bathrooms, and clothing section by sampling air fresheners.

9. Set all alarm clocks to go off at ten minutes intervals throughout the day.

10. Leave cryptic messages one the typewriters.

11. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

12. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.

13. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.

14. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".

15. Play with the automatic doors.

16. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. see if they play along to avoid embarrassment.

17. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this junk, anyway?"

18. Repeat above in the jewelry department.

19. Set up a tent in the camping department.

20. Go to service desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

21. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror to pick your nose.

22. Dart around the store loudly humming the mission impossible theme song.

23. Hide in a clothing rack. When people are browsing through say, "Pick me!".

24. When an annousemnt comes on the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO, NO! It's the voices again!"

25. Go into the dressing room. Shut the door. Wait a while then yell very loudly, "DAMN! There's no toilet paper in here!"

26. Get a batman costume. Put it on and run around the store screaming at the top of your lungs, "COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!"

27. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

28. Take bets on the battle.

29. Go to an empty checkout. Stand and try to check people out.

30. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation.

31. Tape a walkie-talkie to the back of a Barbie doll and say to random people, "I know where you live..."

32. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

33. Try all the sodas and put them back then say, "Yup, that stuff's not poisonous."

34. Hold Barbie for ransom.

35. Tie a plushie to one end of a string and your ankle to the other end, and run around screaming, "HELP! IT'S FATER ME!"

36. Switch the men's and women's signs on the bathroom.

37. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

38. Drive around the entrances screaming, "The British are coming!"

39. Jump through a pyramid of cans yelling "I'M GONNA SAVE US FROM THAT BOMB!"

40. Make a trail of Orange juice on the ground leading to the restrooms.