Absurdist Stories

Tyler is being hunted by the Grinning Man and flees to Marble Springs, where he teams up with Serling and Price, real estate agents who sell haunted houses. ***** After his brother disappears and a burial mound explodes, high school student Tyler Graves starts having strange visions. His brother warns him that something is coming for him. Soon, Tyler's entire family is slaughtered, and he's being hunted by an otherworldly entity known as The Grinning Man. Fleeing to Marble Springs, he meets Serling and Price, real estate agents who specialize in selling haunted houses. It's up to this unlikely trio to stop a madman from destroying the world - by literally unleashing Hell on Earth! (Sequel to Apartment 239.) [[word count: 100,000-150,000 words]]

In a world where elite "speed talkers" are hired to deliver legal disclaimers, contracts, and even negotiations at impossible speeds, a young prodigy discovers that speaking with perfect precision faster than anyone can understand can push entire systems toward collapse.

🥇1st Place - '18 Neon Awards - Random 🥇1st Place - '18 Fruit of Love Awards - Humor I'm Elle, and this is my novel, Jay. After rescuing my kidnapped plot from a minor character, getting kicked out of my house for cheating on Jay with a smut novel, and sobering up from a Wattpad votes and comments addiction, I've had it. I'll never write fiction again. (Our misadventures can be read in any order. Enjoy!)

A dying town launches a rebranding campaign that no one seems to be running. The billboards appear overnight. The slogans don't explain themselves. A diner waitress says nobody puts them up, and nobody takes them down. A couple arrives expecting ironic tourism and finds something closer to a live experiment. Beauchêne doesn't ask visitors to believe anything. It only asks them to stay. To notice. To participate. What begins as small-town decay becomes a slow, sideways unraveling... murals that feel instructional, civic programs that behave like dares, and a town that seems increasingly aware of the people passing through it. A surreal, slow-burn satire about American decline, anti-branding, and the strange comfort of entropy. Meaning doesn't collapse here. It rebrands. Entropy is a vibe. Decline tastes like caramel. Welcome to Beauchêne. You're here now.

A young banker decides to travel to the zoo with his foxy wife to rekindle their relationship, but a gradual slipping in his mind causes him to question her existence.

Kenji: The Inside Man is a satire-light novel following Kenji Takahashi, a veteran undercover operative who's seen it all-except high school. Assigned to infiltrate Sakura High School as a student (yes, as a student), his mission is to uncover the truth behind a suspicious pudding distribution network linked to global experiments on youth behavior. But between rehearsing Shakespeare, spiking volleyballs, and avoiding the romantic attention of teenagers and faculty, Kenji starts to question which is more dangerous: the mission... or the minors. The school seems oblivious. The vending machines are full of suspicious desserts. And the nurse might be part of something bigger than anyone suspects. Comedy, absurdity, and deadpan spy tactics collide in this parody of espionage thrillers and high school anime.

Private Eye Jim is a broke Private Eye.

This story is about Melchior, a 13-billion-something year old consciousness with a lime-flavored galaxy for a soul and no patience whatsoever. He is always and constantly utterly bored and makes new friends everywhere he goes. Well, at least he considers them friends. They might too, if he wouldn't always wreck the planets he visits. Follow him through dimensions and solar systems, as he uncovers mysteries unbeknownst to mankind and maybe you'll figure out, why chaos seems to follow him wherever he goes.

The Sinclair's are wealthy, powerful, and an absolute menace to society. Between suspiciously timed deaths, centuries-old feuds, and a family tree more twisted than a pretzel, life as a Sinclair isn't just about status it's about survival. At the heart of this scandalous mess is Nick Sinclair, a reluctant heir who was never meant to be in this kind of world. Nick is just trying to make it through family dinners without being poisoned, boarding school without being disgraced and shamed, and high society functions without causing local wars and international incidents. He swears his nine-year-old sister Kimberly might be Jack The Ripper reborn as she places him in life or death situations on the daily. And those are just on holidays. The Sinclair siblings must navigate elite society and manage family expectations while also avoiding attempted murderers. Can Nick keep himself alive and sane, or will the Sinclair name be his own undoing as it spits and chews him out? If you enjoy stories like the ones below, this may be the story for you: Knives Out The Addams Family Stories with high society idiots Stories with absurd situations Note: Cover made with AI, I will replace it with a real artist once I start writing more!

This is Kafka meets The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy meets The Metamorphosis in a soup bowl of capitalist nightmares and cosmic whimsy.

The Old Man The Old Man follows Steve, a deaf father trying-and failing-to survive his unbelievably chaotic family. His blind wife Susan, brain-damaged daughter Abigail, and noseless son Earl turn a simple day at home into a disaster of screaming, smearing, and a mysterious cross-eyed dog that shows up only to eat turds off the floor. As a noodle-armed stranger with a toe growing from his palm joins the madness, Steve realizes his life has spiraled beyond all laws of nature. But just when the chaos peaks, he wakes up-forty years old, calm, living in a quiet apartment with a normal cat. It was all one disgusting, ridiculous nightmare. The Old Man is a fast, bizarre, gross-out comedy with a surreal twist and a surprisingly peaceful ending.

COVER ART: "The Glow of the City" by Martin Lewis (1929) (Edited by me)

My rants and opinions will be written in here, some of them controversial, some funny, and some of them disturbing. Feel free to comment your opinion!

In a world marred by tragedy and deception, a woman's life takes an unexpected turn when her mother and brother are found dead under suspicious circumstances. As she grapples with grief and seeks answers, she uncovers a web of dark secrets, intertwining love, death, and crimes. From the unsettling discovery of her brother's murder to the inexplicable involvement of funeral enthusiasts, she is thrust into a maelstrom of confusion and disbelief. As the truth slowly unravels, she must confront the shocking realities that challenge her understanding of family, loyalty, and justice. With each revelation, her once familiar reality crumbles, leaving her to question everything she thought she knew. In a mesmerizing tale that blurs the boundaries of meaning and reality, she embarks on a journey of self-discovery, determined to find solace amidst the chaos. Will she unravel the enigma of her brother's demise, or will the elusive nature of truth forever elude her grasp? "A beautifully crafted narrative that effortlessly blends poetic prose, vivid imagery, and profound introspection, creating a literary experience that lingers in the reader's mind long after the final page."

When pigeons vote gravity out of office, an ordinary retired dentist finds himself recruited by a dreaming Egg. Its mission? To erase Thursday, the most suspicious day of the week. But time doesn't like being edited, and soon Harold is negotiating with bureaucratic owls, duelling with anthropomorphic weekdays, and questioning whether anticipation itself is worth saving.

Jay is a new hire at a hotel where they kill their boss every day.

If you're perfect and have life figured out please don't read this or I'll track you down and throw a shoe at your face. You're too into friends and happiness and experiences. Great. You have 2 minute access to junk-food, social media and malls. Me too. I bet you're always hilariously confused though Those days I used to be as well.Think too much and you'll go into a loop. Think the world is a fucking joke? Read this book.