Age doesn't matter age is just a number Cameron Dallas

The Deal

Amber's P.O.V.

Date:12/20/16

I look around the room. I am at home with Hayes. I wish I was back when I cut last though. I am with Hayes but I have not cut because I miss Cameron. I have fallen in love with Hayes and I miss Cameron. I have no idea what to do. I look over at Hayes who si coming into the room with my coffee.

"Thank you" I say and he nods and sits down next to me.

"We need to talk about something Amber" He says

"Sure" I say

"I know you miss Cameron, I miss him too, he was one of my best friends, so I think I have an idea and a deal for you, now, hear me out, I don't want you to think badly of me because of this, so, since I never told you this I need you to promise you will not be mad" he says and I nod my head yes as in I promise "good, well, I am Bi-sexual" he says and I look at him shocked. I always knew Hayes was bi, I just didn't say anything because I didn't want him to feel like I was calling him out on his lies. "I know you might be mad but here me out, all of the boys are bi or gay, none of us are 100% straight. I know this might be shocking but it's whatever, now, Since I am Bi, and Cameron is Bi, I was thinking, what if we were in a Polyamorous relaionship? What that means is all three of us would be dating. I know that may sound a little weird but i'll make you a deal, if you try this with me, and you don't like it, I promise I will always love you, even if you want to go back to Cameron. Please try this with me" Hayes says and I just look at him for a second. I never really told anyone that I am polyamorous. This means that I date 2 people at once only if they also date. As long as it is me and two boys. I don't like girls like that. I mean, there is nothing wrong with people who like girls like that, I just, personally, don't.

"Hayes, there is something I have to tell you" I say

"What is it" he questions

" I am polyamorous, which mean-"I say but he cuts me off

"I know what it is Amber, I am also poly" He says and I look at him in shock

"Why didn't you tell me" I ask

"Why didn't you tell me" he asks

"Because I thought you think it was weird and break up with me" I say

"So did I" he says "Amber" he questions and I look up at him " Are you poly, maybe, just maybe, because of what happened with us the first time we.... interacted" he asks "because that is most likely the cause between why I am. I mean, I wanted to be with you so badly so I tried to replace you with a bunch of girls at one time" he says

"That might be the reason" I say. In reality, that is the reason. I have always known that what happened had a big affect on me. I always knew I was trying to replace losing my virginity so young with boys that I thought would help and be sweet and nice. But all of them wanted sex and I never wanted that. Until I met Cameron. Then my view on sex changed. Everything changed when I met Cameron. And by everything, I mean everything. I wonder what my life would be like if I never met Cameron and never found Hayes. I wonder if I would still be going through life trying to replace something I lost to young, with something that might be in my future.

"What are you thinking about" he asks

"I was just thinking what my life would be like if I never met you guys. I don't mean it in a bad way either. I mean, let me put it like this, I was always trying to replace losing my virginity with multiple guys at a time. Ones that I thought were nice and might be in my future. Ones that didn't want sex. But all of them changed and wanted sex. I never wanted to have sex because I was always holding onto what I lost to young. Then, without even thinking about it, when I met Cameron, everything changed, my thoughts about sex, my views on sex, everything. I was thinking, would I still be going through life trying to replace something in the past with something that might be in the future. I don't know" I say

"Amber" he says standing up. We were on the couch cuddling when this started. Now I am standing. I don't remember when I stud up. "I love you, no matter what" he says. WAIT WHAT!!!! Hayes and I have not said we love each  other yet. Just like we haven't had sex yet because we don't want to bring up bad memories

"You love me" I ask

"Yes. I always have. From the moment I saw you that one day. I will always love you" he says

"I love you too" I say

"Really" he asks

"Yes Silly, always have, always will" I say

"Well, what do you think of my deal" he asks

"I think it is a good idea" I say. I wonder if Cameron has already agreed to it and that is why Hayes is asking me this. Or even, what If this was Cameron's idea. What if Cameron and Hayes made this as a test for me to see who I would wind up picking in the long run.

"Good" he starts "now all we have to do is talk to Cameron and hopefully get him on board with the idea" Hayes says to me with a weary look in his eyes. Well, that answers my questions in one shot.