JOKES OF THE JOKES

9.WHO WANTS SANTA BANTA, RAISE YOUR LAUGHTER.... :-) :-)

I found myself in a pub in Patiala and a group of American tourists came in.

One of the Americans said, in a loud voice, "I hear you Punjabis think you're great drinkers. I bet $5,000 that no-one here can drink 3 bottles of Jack Daniels in 10 minutes."

The bar was silent, the American noticed Santa leaving, no-one took up the bet. 20 minutes later Santa who left returned and said, "Hey Yank, is your bet still on?"

"Sure," said the American, "3 JD in 10 minutes for a bet of $5,000."

"Great...," replied Santa, "so pour the whisky and start the clock."

It was very close but the last drop was consumed with 2 seconds to spare.

"OK Yank, pay up." said Santa.

"I'm happy to pay, here's your money" said the American. "But tell me, when I first offered the wager I saw you leave. Where did you go?"

"Well sir," replied Santa, "$5,000 is a lot of money to a man like me, so I went to the pub across the road to see if I could do it !

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Santa's RTI Query

Dear Sir,

I have two questions for the lawmakers of our country:

1. If the legal age of a Man to get Sexually active is 18 years and the legal age for him to get married is 21... then what are we actually suggesting he should do these 3 years?

2. Now if the legal age for a Man to get married is 21 years and the legal age for him to start drinking is 25 years... then how do you suggest he survives the first 4 years of marriage???

Any information will be appreciated.
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Banta is lying across the rail tracks with a bottle of Whisky and a tandoori chicken within reach.

A passerby asks, "Banta ji, why are you lying on the rail lines? A train may comee any moment and run over you."

"Precisely!" answers Banta. "I have no desire to live any longer. I want to kill myself."

"Then why have you this bottle of liquor and the tandoori chicken beside you?"

"Why not?" demands Banta. "You can't rely on trains running on time any more. You don't expect me to die of hunger and thirst, do you?"

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Educated Vs Uneducated
A visitor to the capital approached a man at a bus stand and asked, "Sir, will this bus go to Connaught Place?"

"Ya," replied the man.

Not understanding what the word meant he asked another who likewise replied, "Ya."

So did the third and the fourth man. Then he approached Santa and asked the same question.

He replied, "Yes sir, it does."

The visitor further asked, "What does 'Ya' mean? Why did you reply '"Yes sir'?"

"Sir Ji, an educated person always says 'Yes Sir'. Only the uneducated say 'Ya'," replied Santa.

"Are you an educated person?"

"Ya."

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Santa applied for the job of night security guard at the factory.

The boss looked him over carefully.

"The sort of person we need for this job," said the boss finally, "is tough fearless, aggressive, suspicious, distrustful, always on the lookout for trouble and constantly ready to flare into violence. Quite frankly, you don't seem to fit the bill.

"Oh. that is all right," explained Santa. "I HAVE ONLY COME TO APPLY FOR THE JOB ON BEHALF OF MY WIFE."

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Authors POV

Guys I wanted to ask , did anyone understand the joke of the first chapter of my book because I want some suggestions on it..

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