Just Another Boy:Joshler

•12•

Josh
Trigger Warning: Mentions of Self Harm and Suicidal Thoughts

Aiden and I have been looking for therapists for the last week and I am so exhausted of being turned down. According to all of the people I have had evaluations with have said I am need of mental health help but because I'm under 18 and don't have a parents consent I am too much of a "liability" for their practice. During this time Aiden has been helping me as much as they possibly can. They got me a little journal that says "Leave Your Fears Behind" with a galaxy cover.
"Do you think your mom will give her consent for you to go to therapy?" Their voice breaks through the silence in the room, snapping me out of my thoughts.
"If she cared don't you think she would have wanted me to come back home or even make sure I am safe and not living on the streets?" I asked rather annoyed at Aiden. I know it's not their fault but I've been living with them for three months now, and my mother hasn't even sent me a text making sure I'm alive, obviously she doesn't care about my mental health.
"I'm sorry Josh. I'm just trying to help, I don't want you to have to wait until you turn 18, that's still three months away and I'm afraid you won't make it till then..." They whisper the last part but the words echo in my head at a deafening volume. As much as we both probably don't want to accept what Aiden whispered as true, we both are fully aware that it is.
"Aiden can you help me with dinner please?" Their mom tells from the bottom of the stairs, after receiving a confused look from them, they stand and head back downstairs. I turn back to my school work trying to concentrate on the math before me. However I find it nearly impossible to focus and make my way down the stairs.
"Mom I don't know what to do about the whole consent thing, he isnt going to make it to his 18th, let alone past it to even receive any therapy appointments." Aiden's mom replies with a sigh and simply states "I didn't know it was that bad sweetie, I will try calling the therapist and inform them of what's going on. Maybe they will agree to see him if they think he is too unstable to wait. Is there anything else I should know?" There is a long pause and I begin to grow impatient, what are they going to tell her? A shaky breath is released and Aiden continues, "uh yea actually, he has self harmed every night for the past two months, he seems to never have motivation for anything and all he wants to do is sleep, except he is up into the early hours of the morning. What if the therapist disagrees to seeing him and he commits suicide? I can't lose my best friend Mom." The tears are pouring down Aiden's checks and their mom tries to calm them down. I want to go comfort them and tell them I would never leave them, that I'm okay. But my feet take me in a different direction as my minds screams at me.
You have been here for three months and you are hurting them so much. If you really loved them you would do what's best and leave.

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Word Count: 579 words