A Harry Potter and Twilight crossover

Chapter 3- Meeting The Lumpy Whore

"OMFG! You live in a castle!" Emmet said and nearly jumped out of the carriage.

"Yes, that's weird to you?" Hermione said. Harry and pals got stuck in the same carriage as the Cullen's.

"Yes!" Emmet said, craning his neck to see it.

"So about the toddler, is she a vampire?" Ron asked pointing to Renesmee who was staring out the window.

"She's half vampire." Bella said.

"Half? How can she be half?" Hermione asked.

"Well little British kids with your cute British accents, when a man loves a woman they-" Edward started.

"They humped each other and Bella got pregnant when she was still a human." Emmet said over his shoulder. Alice and Jasper started laughing, and Bella would have been red if she could still blush.

"Vampires can get humans pregnant?" Harry asked.

"Yes, let that be a warning to you kids, use plastic bags." Emmet said.

"You said you were good vampires. Are their bad ones?" Hermione pressed.

"Yeah, the bad ones are the Romanians. Stay away from those messed up mother fuc-" Rosalie slammed her hand over Emmet's mouth.

"No. All vampires are bad to humans except for the ones that feed on animal blood like us and live alongside humans like us." Rosalie finished.

"What about the Volturi?" Renesmee spoke up.

"Volturi?" Harry said, raising his eyebrows.

"Yeah, they enforce vampire laws, they live in Italy and are all really strong and powerful. They are like royalty." Edward said.

"Are they evil?" Ron asked.

"No, they are only evil to vampires who break the law, do you have any bad wizards?" Bella asked. It got really silent and uncomfortable.

"Yeah." Harry muttered.

"It's the reason why he has a scar." Alice said. Everyone was shocked that Alice said that.

"How did you know that?" Harry asked.

"Saw it in a vision." Alice said.

"Your psychic?" Hermione scrunched up her nose.

"Yes, that is my power. Only certain vampires have extra powers. Mine is seeing what happens in the future if someone decides something." Alice explained.

"Really?" Hermione asked.

"Yeah smarty pants, she can." Edward snapped.