i was looking up short haircuts (that would lowkey make me look like a guy) with my mom and i looked up 'korean block haircut' and a bunch of male korean models with the haircut popped up and then my mom was all like
'No, im not going to let you look like a boy'
and then i was like
'well what's wrong with looking like a boy?'
and she looked sternly at me and said
'because you're not a boy'
and then i was like
'so? what does that have to do with looking like a boy?'
and she did this fake laugh and said
'why don't you ask your dad about that.'
'but he's a boy.'
'and he doesn't want you looking like one'
and then when i asked her about what she thought about the name malikai and she linked it right to christianity
first i went to the bathroom to cry while texting amberwolf222 because I don't know what to do now and it makes me think that they definitely wont let me be a boy if i decide to confess to them
and now im crying again explaining because thinking more and more about is making my mind go all over the place. My dysphoria is probably going to get worse because i don't want to be a girl, and i cant live with it forever
i just needed to vent, sorry
makes me think that my parents are transphobics
im so pissed and disappointed and upset at the same time and i just cant..
