Mmhmm...
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1) It's Not Exciting If You Get Canadian Change Back From The Store. ...True. I mean, it was exciting for the first 5 years of my life, but now it's just like, "Oh, a Canadian penny. Useless as of now." But you can get away with spending Canadian change, because who cares?
2) Everyone Points To Their Palms To Give Directions. Hey, when you can literally pull up a map of your state on your hands, you're gonna tell people where to go... using your hands.
3) Everyone's At Least Hit 2 Deer While Driving. My parents are here to confirm this. Also, if you, for some reason, have not hit 2 deer, you can name at least 5 people who have.
4) 95% of Michiganders Hate Ohio State. Our rivalry is so strong, in 2013, Ohio's governor, banned usage of the letter "M" for a week. A WEEK.
5) We're All Cars Freaks. Everyone either works in, has worked in or knows a lot of people who work in the car industry. You'll also find us playing car related games on road trips...
6) Euchre Is Serious Business. A card game, that everyone (besides me) knows how to play. Almost every time we get together with family, someone'll pull out a deck of cards and say, "Who's up for some Euchre?" (You-ker)
7) Minutes, not Miles. We give distances in minutes, not miles. "How far away is Ann Arbor?" "Oh, about 15 minutes." You guys have definitely seen a post, or two, of mine where I measure distances in minutes, instead of miles, right?
8) Weather. Our weather is really weird, okay? There was snow on the ground this morning, and then it melted. It was 60 (F) last weekend, yesterday it was around 30 (F). It's supposed to be 50 (f) on Christmas, for crying out loud! It's too warm to be December.
9) Lakes n Shit. You can't live in Michigan and not know how to swim, okay? 5 massive lakes (but we only border with 4... *looks at Lake Ontario on a map*) and 10,000+ inland lakes, plus pools and stuff that every state has... Swimming, boating and water activities are basically a part of life, here.
10) Jumper Cables. Car needs to be jump started? EVERYONE knows how to use jumper cables. Just another perk of living in a state where you're known for automobiles...
11) Two Types of Lighthouses: Real Ones and Orange Barrels. You'd think I'm kidding. But, nah, the roads are ALWAYS under construction, and they take forever to fix them... So... Lots of lighthouses because of the lakes, and lots of orange barrels because of construction.
~Pronunciations and Slang!~
1) We do actually call the Lower Peninsula, "The Mitten." It's in our vocab.
2) Say U.P. like "You Pea." If you're from outta state and you refer to the Upper Peninsula as "up," you will get strange looks.
3) Up North. Everywhere that is North of you is 'Up North.' Everywhere.
4) In Michigan, we...
...go tuh the store, not "to" it.
...yoosta' have jobs in Detroit, not "used to"
...go huntin' in the wuds, not the "woods"
...get our tires slashed for driving a Tie-ota, not a Toyota.
...say er, not "or."
...feel like we're ki-nuh like Minnesotans, not "kind of."
5) FIP's. Fucking Illinois People.
6) FOP's. Fucking Ohio People.
7) We also add syllables. Yep.
However, we ONLY do this if it makes it easier to say.
Realtor is just too hard to say, so it's "real-uh-terr."
I live near Cook Nuclear Power Plant, "nuke-yuh-ler." (I don't actually live near it.)
8) You'll get your license from the Secretariah State. In Michigan, we go to the Secretary of State to get our driver's license, not the Bureau/Department of Motor Vehicles as in other states.Right. It's not "Secretary of State" it's "Secretariah State." My parents say this all the time.
9) Trolls and Yoopers. Yoopers = People who live in the U.P. Trolls = People who live in the L.P. (because it's under the Mackinac Bridge... ha.)
10) Pop. Not soda. I'll say soda every now and again, but just because I've grown used to it. I would always say "pop" when I was younger, though.
11) Yuh guys. Other's say "Y'all," "Youse guys" and "You guys," but not us. "Yuh guys" it is.
12) Ja-eat? Probably could've just shortened "Did you eat?" to "Didja eat?" but that'd be WAY too mainstream, right?
13) Fyer, Meer and Cloze. Fire? Mirror? Clothes? Huh, what are those?
14) Place Names. Oh yes.
Pontiac - This is pronounced "pah-neeack." If you say the "t" sound, you will give away that you're not from Michigan.
Dowagiac - You say this like "D'waah-jack" with an emphasis on the "waah" part.
Livonia - This is pronounced like "Lih-vone-yuh," so don't do an "ia" at the end. It's definitely "yuh."
Grand Rapids - The first part of this city name is apparently too much for Michiganders, so we just skip parts of it: "Grranrapids."
Wyandotte - This is less common, but it's "Whine-dot" not "Wy-and-dot."
15) "How am I supposed to say it?" Becomes: "How my spose'ta' sayit'?"
16) Double T? Nah, bro. Kitten and Button become Kih'ihn and Buh'ton.
17) The 'T' becomes a 'D.' City? We say it like "Ciddy."
18) "Ah." In Michigan, you don't have a mom. You have a "maahm." And after school, you go to "haahckey" practice. On a slightly related note, Chicago is "Chic-aah-go," not "Chi-caw-go."
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All of these, stereotypes, pronunciations and slang...
All of them are things I either do, say or use.
While looking this stuff up, I spent a majority of my time laughing, because all of it's true!
Stereotypes are fun! Until they're offensive...
Like, apparently we're known for loving potato chips? The U.P. is full of murderers? We're all obsessed with Kellogg's? Uhm... No, we really aren't.
But, yeah.
Hope you enjoyed my stereotypes :3
//I spent an hour on this.
YOU ARE READING
Rants and Life Updates 2
RandomThe second rant/life update book of mine. Same rules from the first book apply to this. Rated 'Mature' for the same reasons, as well.
