Puns.1

☧Day #38: G u i t a r puns

☧Day #38: G u i t a r puns

☸ What do you call two guitarists playing in unison?

        ⌦ Counterpoint.

☸ How do you get a guitar player to play softer?

        ⌦ Give him a sheet of music.

☸ Why was the guitar teacher arrested?

         ⌦ For fingering A minor.

☸ What do you call a guitar that never finishes a job?

         ⌦ a quitar

☸ How many guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?

        ⌦ Twenty. One to change the bulb and nineteen to say, "Not bad, but I could've done better".

☸ What does a guitarist say when he gets to his gig?

        ⌦ Would you like fries with that?

☸ What do you call a female police officer who plays guitar?        

        ⌦ SHE RIFF

☸ What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

        ⌦ Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

☸ What is the difference between a guitar and a tuna fish?

        ⌦ You can tune a guitar but you can't tuna fish. [I JUST GOT THIS JOKE]

☸ What do you call a guitar player without a girlfriend?

        ⌦ Homeless.

☸ What do you call a cow that plays guitar?

        ⌦ A moo-sician

☸ Did you hear about the farmer who played guitar out in his cornfield?        

        ⌦ It was music to his ears.

☸ What do you call a guitar player who only knows two chords?

        ⌦ A music critic.

☸ How do you make him stop playing?

        ⌦ Put notes on it!

☸ What do you get when you cross a chicken with a guitar?

        ⌦ a chicken that makes music when you pluck it!

☸ What did the guitar say to the guitarist?

         ⌦ Pick on someone your own size!

☸ What do you call a guitar moving?

        ⌦ Walk and roll.

☸ What's the definition of a minor second?

        ⌦ Two lead guitarists playing in unison.

☸ Did you hear about the guitar player that was stressed?

        ⌦ He was strung out! 

[I was making my biology teacher's son a christmas greeting card/pun card because its his first year being in the military during Christmas c:]