Karma and Amy - Not so Faking it

Chapter 8 - I'm Not That Girl

Amy's POV

Karma had ran out of the room in a rush, I couldn't do anything, it's not like I could just get up and follow her, in the considtion that I am in.  I sighed, it wasn't fair....life, I hated it.  I sighed and replied to Haley, but I wasn't happy when I was texting her, all I could think about was Karma and the way that I had just broken her heart...the way that she had broken mine a year ago.  I sighed for a third time.  I just needed to talk to her and get everything out on the table, but I couldn't do that, I was stuck here in this stupid bed, in this stupid town, with my stupid heart - part of me wished that I could just get rid of it, so I didn't love anyone, so nobody could ever hurt me again. 

Karma's POV

I walked home in the rain, I could tell what time it was one being I had left my phone at home and two being that the sky was so clouded up with well clouds I couldn't see the sun.  I sighed to myself, thinking of only moments ago I had been telling Amy how I felt about her...and how she didn't feel the same about me, I couldn't help but to think - this is how she felt when I did this to her a year ago.  I took a deep breath.  It hurt, I could feel the pain in my heart, and how that pain ran throughout my body, everywhere was in some sort of pain.  I stopped and pushed my hair back, I hated feeling this way, I didn't want to feel this pain, it was like I couldn't breath.  I leaned against a lamp post trying to feel okay, or at least a little bit okay, but that feeling never came.

I got to that stage when I was in complete tears, I could feel them falling onto the already wet ground.  I didn't want this....If this was love, I did not want it.  I took one last deep breath and tried to stop the tears before I got home, so my parents wouldn't ask what was wrong, because I didn't want to tell them, I didn't want them to know, for them to know that I loved Amy....and that she did not love me. 

Amy's POV

I had been texting Haley for about two hours, I wasn't enjoying it as much as I thought I would be, It's not because she is not a nice girl...she is great, and part of me would have loved her so much....if it weren't for what Karma had told me.  I didn't know what was wrong with me, I had told myself not to love her and yet, something had suddenly changed when she told me that she loved me too. What was wrong with me, she had broken my heart and yet I still loved her, why, WHY?  I didn't want this again...I didn't want the pain that I had a year ago. I hated feeling this way, I didn't like being stuck in the middle of two girls that I loved, this is so stupid, how can you love two people at the same time.  Was it even possible? I was so annoyed at myself for this. 

My phone buzzed, and I wanted to throw my phone away, but I didn't want to ruin it.  I sighed and placed it on my bedside table calmly, it buzzed a few more times, I looked at it, it was more of a glare, I crossed my arms, well at least tried, my phone buzzed one more time and then it was silent.

"Thank GOD!!" I whispered to myself
I didn't care who it was from I just didn't want to talk or text anyone I curled up in the sheets of the hospital bed that I still hadn't gotten used to even though I had been here for almost a week. 

Karma's POV

I walked into the house, I skipped dinner, I didn't want to eat, I couldn't eat.  I went straight to my room, turned the light off, I curled up in my blankets, I shut my tear stained eyes. I didn't want to be in this much pain anymore,  I just wanted to be happy for once in my life and not soooo sad.  I took a deep breath and tried to stop the tears falling from my eyes, but it was no good, I couldn't help but cry. I felt like I had lost my soul mate. I remembered a time when me and Amy had joked about being soul mates, I didn't believe it until now, I believed it with so much of my being it hurt.  I just wanted to run back to that hospital and kiss her and hold her and tell that I will never leave her at all.  I sniffed back my tears, and closed my eyes, maybe with some sleep this pain will go away.

Amy's POV

I woke in the morning, I sat up in bed and I was surprised to see my mother, Lauren and my step-father, I half-smiled, what where they doing here?

"Morning" I said sleeply
"morning Amy" my step-father said
My mother smiled, and then I noticed how she had a bag of my things that they had brought to the hospital for me when I first got here. I smiled
"I am going home?" I asked
"yes, the doctor said we can take you home" my Mother said and came and put her hand on my good shoulder and squeezed it, she was never much of a hugger.  I smiled as Lauren brought over the wheel chair. She had some what become nicer and a better sister in some ways.
"let's go" she mubbled, I rolled my eyes and then got into the chair. 

I smiled when leaving the hospital, I was finally leaving this place.  I had hated every moment...well not every moment.  I held my phone in my hand and I looked through the messages that Haley had sent me last night and it ended with....

'You know if you didn't like me, you could have just said'

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HEY guys,

sorry this was kinda a nothing chapter, but I promise the next one will be better, sorry again.

Beck