How the Signs Will Probably Die

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Aries: Did it for the vine

Taurus: Accidentally drinking cyanide thinking it was vodka

Gemini: Drowning in drama

Cancer: Lounging on the couch so long that they forgot necessities

Leo: Got into a car accident because they saw a cute puppy

Virgo: Died from sadness after their otp didn't work out

Libra: Trampled in a Black Friday Sale rush

Scorpio: Suffocated under the weight of their own bitterness

Sagittarius: Bungee jumping with a sketchy company

Capricorn: Burned by sunlight

Aquarius: Death by roast

Pisces: Choked to death from the cinnamon in 2010

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