Black Rose || The Outtakes

Black Rose || Outtake 41

Author's Note: She's back. Enjoy!

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1996 - After "History" Tour concert.

SHANA MANGATAL

"Michael, Michael!" we chanted.

Brenda and I applauded. Our eyes had watched the television monitor backstage like two schoolgirls. After the screen turned blue, we exchanged glances before cackling out loud. A dark shade of lipstick colored her warm smile when Brenda balled up one fist to cover her mouth. As we planned to leave, a voice rang through my ears before long.

"I can hear you two!" Michael shouted from down the hallway. Brenda and I only laughed much harder than the first time. We continued prepping to leave. Brenda planned to excuse herself for the restroom when Michael appeared. Not one bodyguard escorted.

In his white military jacket, Michael stood in the doorway. Brenda now faced him and I could only see the back of her straightened hair. Nearly jet-black in this light. She squirmed awkwardly in the name of bladder and excused herself from him.

I'd slipped on my own purse ready to leave again when Michael spoke up out of nowhere. He'd continue standing in the doorway at this point. Respectfully, I sat down. He spoke with very few people in all the years we'd known each other. Most of the crew members here just dealt with his professional side and nothing else. I'd even removed my Lakers hat, playing with my hair to somehow look presentable.

"Do you know who she is?" Michael asked me.

At first, I didn't know what to think of his question. But I knew he referred to the woman who just left. Had this been over three years, confusion would've rushed into my mind. I worked for his manager Sandy Gallin at the time.

If I remember correctly, Michael just left a post Grammy event. Brenda stood across from him in the most beautiful dress, but I only recall the shade of black. Millions of other things racked my brain since working for Sandy, but I'd always recall those two whispering about something before my feet hauled toward Gallin's limousine.

"Now I do. She's quite friendly." I smiled. My back worked on good posture with the sofa cushions behind me. For whatever reason, I found myself still uneasy around Michael.

If only Brenda would come back. The awkwardness only heightened while I chewed my bottom nervously. Michael's long hair tied back as usual, but strands still fell around his face. He paced back and forth, blushing almost childishly.

"It's cliché, but she's my heart. You have no idea, Shawn." I nodded, understanding. It seemed that his world revolved around this sweetheart outside of his musical dreams.

At the sight of Brenda finally returning to this area, Michael stood and walked over with such confidence. The poise itself mirrored his identity on stage. I pressed both lips together as soon as the white jacket lazily dropped off Michael's shoulders. His ivory V-neck revealed muscles I'd only see rarely.

In truth, I missed those nights alone with him.

Jackson allowed that jacket to drop onto the floor and slowly reached out to hold Brenda's face with both hands. They kissed so delicately, I now the depth of Michael's previous words to me. He'd love this woman from end to end.

His voice softly whispered to her as if I never even took a seat here. His words soon traveled to a space between her ear and neck. In between his sweet nothings, he pecked her dark brown skin as if she were a fragile creature. Almost a mirage. Not once did I clear my throat to disturb them.

Tears welled in my eyes. A pulse within me nearly ached. I topped my head with the Lakers hat to shield emotion. I finally understood previous rage of Lisa Marie. No one else compared to Brenda Michelle Hughes, with or without marriage. I never tied to knot with Michael, but seeing him react to an ex like this, must've devastated his previous wife.

Annoyed, I finally cleared my throat. My arms somehow resisted flailing. Michael turned those brown eyes in my direction and Brenda kissed his cheek before strutting away on heeled black boots. The butt of her jeans nearly glittered in this light before she fully disappeared.

Michael chewed his bottom lip as usual, but I wouldn't give in. There was only a dead silence between us before he responded.

"Are you serious?" I narrowed my eyes. "Now I understand why you and Lisa divorced. She probably hates Brenda, Michael."

"Actually, they're friends." Michael answered under his breath. I folded both arms within seconds and shook my head under this hat of mine. "Stop making assumptions."

"Then what are we?" I scoffed, tossing my hands on the couch. Once Michael scrunched up his face, I felt disgusted.

"If I'm willing to kiss "Baby Girl." in front of you, what does that mean?" Michael finally picked up his jacket from the floor. "You can't be that naïve, Shawn." I rolled my eyes at the cue of Brenda's nickname. Tears came back, but I refused to cower.

"What was the point of flirting with me if you're in love with the Soul Train Whore?" I crossed a line with Michael, but didn't even care. Headlines never proved anything else with Brenda.

"Get out." he clenched his teeth now. Without another word, I left his sight. At the hotel that night, I sobbed into a pillow, frustrated with myself.