"Johnny!" I yelled as I doubled over in pain clutching my stomach. My husband Johnny came running into the kitchen to find me on the floor in obvious pain.
"(Y/N) calm down. It's going to be ok. I'll go get the suitcase." He said in a reassuring voice before running up the stairs to retrieve my bag. When he had gotten my bag he led me to his car before we headed towards Rockyview General.
Johnny rushed me into the hospital and desperately yelled out for a nurse. A nurse was there in a matter of seconds with a wheelchair in front of her. I quickly sat down in the wheelchair before they wheeled me off to a room.
After I had changed into my gown with the help of the nurse, I was settled in the hospital bed cringing with pain. Panic was setting in.
"Babe, breathe. In and out. In and out." Johnny whispered in my ear as I felt like I was started to hyperventilate.
"Johnny, I c-can't do this. It h-hurts and we haven't even gotten to the delivery room." I cried as a doctor walked into the room.
"Hello Mr. and Mrs. Gaudreau, I'm Doctor Cameron. I'll be delivering the baby today. Let me check to see what you're dialated to."
The doctor checked my cervix and clapped his hands together.
"Ok. This baby is ready to come out. Are you ready?" He asked looking at me.
I gulped nervously before I was rushed to the delivery room with Johnny hot on my tail.
After what felt like hours of the delivery progress which was actually only ten minutes I heard a nurse let out a gasp.
"What's wrong?" I ask anxiously panicking in t he process. The doctor and nurses were rushing around the room only making more terrified with the baby's condition. Johnny left my side for a mere minute to check in what was happening.
"(Y/N)" Johnny said quietly with tears in his eyes.
"No, Johnny please no. This can't happen to us! No!" I screamed as the nurses tried to restrain me and Johnny tried to comfort me when everything went black.
I woke up a few hours later, or so that's what they told me. They told me the cord was wrapped around his neck and that cut off his oxygen supply level. I listened timidly and nodded along with the doctor. I was released a few hours later.
On the drive home Johnny held my hand in his as I stared at the empty carseat in the back of the car.
"(Y/N)...." Johnny silently sighed as he said my name and we pulled up into the driveway.
"Are you hungry? I know this really good Italian restaurant down the street I've been wanting to try or we could go back to th-" I started to say to get our baby off my mind before I was cut off.
"STOP!" Johnny yelled abruptly.
I looked up at him for the first time since we had left the hospital and tears started to stream down my face.
"What did I do to him? Why us?" I cried as I started to jump out of the car.
"(Y/N) stop!" I heard my husband of two years yell as I opened the door to the house and ran straight into the light blue painted nursery. I fell on the floor in pure agony looking around at the room.
"(Y/N)this is not your fault at all. I don't know why this happened to us, but I sure do wish I did." Johnny whispered to me as he sat next to me on the floor. I leaned my head on his shoulder and just let the tears slide down my face silently.
"This isn't the end (Y/N). We can still have more children as many as you w-" Johnny began to say before I lashed out.
"NO! Have you forgotten about OUR son! Lucas Ryan Gaudreau! That was his name. You can't just replace him. You a father? What a joke. You don't even treat me good enough!" I yelled facing a shocked Johnny Hockey.
A single tear fell from my husband's eye before he walked out of the nursery and out the door to our house.
Johnny's POV
I started my truck and sped down the highway with more tears flowing from my eyes. I can't believe what she said to me. I've wanted this longer than she has. I pulled into the driveway and knocked on the door in font of me.
Sean emerged from with door with a goofy grin on his face.
"What's up Daddy Hock-" He started to ask before he saw my tear stained face.
"She lost him. We lost him Sean. He's gone." I cried stepping into his house.
Sean stood there silently trying to take it all in.
"Dude, I-I'm sorry, but why are you here? Shouldn't you be with (Y/N)?"
"That's exactly the problem. She's glad he's gone. She called me being a father some sort of sick joke." I laughed harshly before punching the wall in front of me.
"She didn't mean that Johnny. She's just fragile right now. Go to her. Tell her how much you love her."
(Y/N) POV
I can't blame him for walking out on me. I realize now I shouldn't have said all of those horrible things. The sound of the keys in the lock made me jump right before Johnny entered the house with a tear stained, red puffy face.
"Johnny..." I said quietly as I approached him.
"(Y/N) I want you to know that I love you with all my heart and I couldn't live without you. You and I are like the sky and the stars. You and I are like peanut butter and jelly. I need you like a fire needs gasoline. It's you (Y/N). That's all I really need in this life." Johnny said as he pressed his forehead to mine.
"I love you Johnny, and nothing will ever change that. I'm so sorry. You would have been the greatest father in the world." I cried as he embraced me.
"And you would have been the greatest mother."
PART TWO OR NO?
