Boar

==> Enter name.
Idiotic Plumber.
You're an idiotic plumber.

==> Try again.
You don't know your name. But most people call you Boar.

==> Type paragraphs about yourself and pretend that people care.
Again, your go by the nickname BOAR. It is clearly NOT YOUR BIRTHDAY. That's in APRIL. You are the SYLPH OF LIGHT according to some quiz you found on the internet. Speaking of the internet, you spend A LOT OF TIME THERE. Some of your other interests include SINGING and WRITING. You love your FANDOMS, which include HOMESTUCK, BLACK BUTLER, ATTACK ON TITAN, and a plethora of other things. Your hobbies range from ROLEPLAYING to PRACTICING THE ART OF INSULTS. Not to say you're actually good at either of those, but you can keep trying. Your best friends include karkittysBeats, Axrott_Bhutan, and celenegirl13.
You wield the wandKind specibus and have combined your SHITTY WAND with your FAVORITE PEN and SONIC SCREWDRIVER to create your awesome weapon.
Your chumHandle is uncannyAnnotation.
The consorts of your land, Land of Portals and Spires (LOPAS), are EASILY DISTRACTED TRANSLUCENT SNAKES who like EXPLORATION.

==> Read some fanfiction.