Shourtney - The Silent Girl

Chapter 14

Shayne's POV

Courtney shook her head and released my hands. She then began writing once more.

You could do a lot better than me Shayne.

Me - What are you saying Courtney?

I'm saying I'm not good enough for you. I don't want you to love me because you will only be wasting your time, you can do much better than a stupid silent girl like me.

Me - You're not stupid Court. You're amazing.

I'm pathetic. I'm not even strong enough to tell you why I don't talk, let alone commit myself to you. I really like you Shayne. You are the only person who gets me, but I don't want to hurt you, and so I'm telling you now, please don't say you love me.

Me - What do you want me to do, bury my feelings for you?

My tone of voice was pretty angry. Why was she saying all of this stuff?

Me - I-I thought you'd be happy to hear that I love you...

I soon found myself sobbing, and Courtney began crying too. She wrapped an arm around my shoulders and kissed my cheek, before beginning to write yet another note.

You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear that you love me, but I'm scared that if I say it back I will hurt you too much in the future. I just don't want to let you down. I care about you too much.

Me - If you care about me that much then you would want what's best for me, right?

She nodded.

Me - Ok, and in my eyes you are what's best for me. Out of all of the girlfriends I have had you are the only one who has really understood me, and you are the only one who I can be myself around. I love you Courtney, nothing can stop that. I'm sorry if that is not what you wanna hear, but I can't deny my feelings.

Courtney stood up and wiped away her tears, before writing another note.

I'm sorry.

I stood up and held her hands as I looked deep into her emerald green eyes.

Me - There is nothing you need to be sorry for, I just don't understand... If you're not into me than just say, I'd rather you be upfront with me rather than lying.

I'm not lying Shayne, I'm crazy about you, I just don't want to tell you I love you in case I hurt you in the future. I'm not good for you. 

Me - Fine, just tell me right now, am I wasting my time? I don't like wasting my time. I-I'm mad about you, but if you don't want me then just tell me.

Of course I want you, I'm just scared.

Me - You keep saying you're scared but you never say what of. What are you scared of?

Hurting you Shayne, breaking your heart. All I want is for you to be happy.

I smiled slightly and kissed her on the lips.

Me - I'm happy when I'm with you.