dolan twins imagines

afraid | gray

you sat awake in the middle of the night, wondering how you were going to telling grayson that you loved him. wondering how he would react, you smiled as you imagined the positive outcome. you sat up in the chair just in front of the window, your eyes watching the stars and the moon high in the sky. 

grayson stirred in his sleep, he tried to pull you closer but realized you weren't in the bed. he lifted his head up quickly and from the moon light you could tell his eyebrows were furrowed as he patted your spot. he sat up and wiped his eyes, your attention turning back outside the window. "y/n?" grayson mumbled seeing your small figure. 

"yeah?" you asked quietly, not turning around to look at him. 

he turned the light that was on his nightstand on, your turning your head looking at the sleepy boy. "what are you doing? why are you awake?" he asked and you shrugged. "it seems like something is on your mind, what's up?" he asked and you bit the inside of your lip contemplating if you should say the three words. 

you looked at him, his brown eyes tired and eyebrows furrowed creating worry lines. his hair messy from the movements he made in his sleep. his upper half covered by the gray bed sheets and white comforter, you swallowed thickly. "i love you," you said loud enough for him to hear. his breath hitched in his throat, not prepared for those three words. 

he nodded his head and you sat there waiting for him to say it back like you had imagined. "okay. come on and go back to bed," he said trying to change the subject and you furrowed your eyebrows. 

you were taken back not prepared for this kind of response, "do you not love me?" you asked and he sighed, rubbing his hands over his face. 

"y/n right now is not the time. it's three in the morning and i have to film with ethan at eight," he said and you scoffed. "come on, just come back to bed," he said lightly patting your spot. 

you shook your head, "no thanks," you said looking out the window once again. he sighed out of annoyance, his head falling back onto the pillows as he was unsure of what to say. the two of you just sat in silence, your eyes stinging as they filled with water and you blinked it away. grayson laid in the bed, his eyes on the ceiling. "do you not like me anymore? have you moved on?" you asked. 

grayson shook his head, "no. that's not even close," he said and you nodded. 

"so you like me you just don't love me," you said and he stayed silent. "that's cool, i mean it would've been nice for you to let me know before we moved in together because right now i feel pretty uncomfortable," you rambled and he closed his eyes, taking in your words. 

"i can't say them back," he mumbled and your head snapped towards him. 

you were more furious than sad, he made you feel like a fool. "you can't say them back," you repeated and gave a pathetic laugh. "that's great, really! well you're not that incapable of saying them because you tell your mom and sister those three words all the time!" you said and he shook his head. "why can't them grayson?" you pushed and he let out a heavy sigh. 

"i just can't."

"tell me why you can't because you can grayson. i've heard you say them numerous amount of times! you even say it to your fans but not to your girlfriend!" you said and he closed his eyes, taking in a deep breath. "you very capable grayson. maybe we should just be done then," you said and he looked at you. 

"i can't say those words because i'm scared," he said raising his voice and you scoffed. 

"you're scared? you're scared to them to me, okay."

"yes y/n, i'm scared to say those words to you," he said getting mad. 

"what is there to be scared about?" you asked and he stayed silent. "what grayson? what are you so scared about?" you asked again. 

"i'm scared of falling in love!" he yelled and it threw you off. you features softened as you started registering his words. "i'm scared that if i fall in love with you, you'll leave. it's happened before to me, who's to say it won't happen again," he explained and you got up walking over to him. 

you sat down next to him, grabbing his hand in a comforting way. "grayson i love you. i will always choose you over any other guy because you're the only one for me. i won't leave you unless you want me to, you should know that by now," you said and he nodded. 

"i do, i just don't want to get hurt again," he said and you nodded understanding. you lifted his chin up, looking into his eyes before pressing your lips against his. you pushed him down on the bed so you were straddling him. you pulled away and he smiled slightly, "i love you y/n," he said and you smiled kissing him again.