The Art of the Heart

Water Cooler Fodder

All Lindsey could hear at this stage was a soft, muffled tapping sound and a sort of whooshing. If there was any conversation, it was happening too far from the phone to be heard. He waited impatiently; not being privy to Stevie's plan was killing him.

Suddenly, Henley's voice was loud in his ear, strained with desire, "This may be a little forward even for me, but Stevie, honey, your ass just gets better with age."

A bit forward? It's a bit fucking forward all right! Next time I see you I'll show you how forward my knuckles are! It's not like I didn't make it clear that Stevie and I are together. Jesus.

He thought he heard a slight edge in her voice when she replied, though not enough that Henley would have doubted the genuineness of her reaction. Her tone was low and seductive, "Oh, Don. There's no such thing as too forward between us. Don't you remember the things you used to ask me to do for you?"

Oh, hell no! Someone get me a sick bag! Ewwww. Oh, no. No, no, no! What does she mean, anyway? What things? Like, actually what? Kinky stuff? Bondage? Are we talking back passage here, or what? Or a fetish? Oh, ahhhh, that'll be it! He's exactly the sort of motherfucker who would have a thing for feet....or elbows, or armpits or some goddamn thing. Huh. He's probably such a pencil dick he can't use the thing properly to satisfy himself OR anyone else. Nope, he definitely didn't satisfy Stevie. Let me think, I can't even remember how many times we had sex while she was with him. Gotta have been dozens, though. That's not a good sign. I know I'm irresistible and all but he was a big star then. And she was pretty into him for a while there. Surely if the sex had been that good she wouldn't have needed me to service her? She always seemed so desperate for release....ahahaha! That's it! Maybe he could do the turning on but not the finishing off. What a loser! He needs to get his priorities straight! You attend to your woman first. Always the woman first, assuming you can hold on long enough. OH! Maybe that's it! Maybe he can't last ten minutes without blowing his load prematurely. Uhhh, oh, now I actually feel a bit sorry for him. Imagine having Stevie bouncing on your dick (uhh, settle down down there my man, I didn't mean you) and only getting to enjoy it for the blink of an eye before it was all over. Oh no. Uh-uh. That wouldn't do at all. It wouldn't matter what the hell he'd been asking for if he couldn't help but come immediately anyway. Ahhhhhh, LOL. What a sucker.

Lindsey's reverie had captured his imagination so much that he had missed the sound of Stevie and Don going into a private room and Stevie casually choosing a seat at the large solid oak table that ran down the centre of the room. She pushed Don down into the chair forcefully and looked carefully out of the corner of her eye at the manila envelope on the table nearby.

Everything is set, then. They must have got at least one good one. Right. I better just make sure he's as turned on as he can possibly get. To make this really hit home he needs to be absolutely gagging for it. This should work.....he's always been fairly predictable.

Lindsey was just wondering what was going on as all he could hear was soft rustling, when Henley's strangled, thick voice assaulted his eardrum again.

"Arrrrhum. Oh, shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitt! Stevie, you're, oh god, you're....."

You're WHAT? WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE DOING?! It didn't help that he was having to strain badly to hear anything at all now. Nor did it help that along with Henley's breathless monologue, he could hear, very very faintly, Stevie giggling a little and eventually replying, "Mmm, you like that don't you, Don? I remember exactly how you like it."

Is this for real? Hang on a minute. She wasn't just telling Plant some bullshit story to get rid of him, was she? She certainly sounds like she's enjoying it! And what the fuck is she doing? Surely blowing him isn't a requirement of whatever plan she's got? Ugh. This is making me feel queasy. I need some goddamn antacids or something.