hi everyone! it’s been a minute i know but i wanted you all to know that i am so okay and doing so much better now. i won’t be returning to wattpad, but i did log back into my account for a moment to look up a quote from my yule ball chapter. George says to Callie, “Sorry, i just couldn’t find a word to do you justice. Beautiful just doesn’t seem like enough.” Last night, the man i fell in love with back in september looked into my eyes and said almost the exact same thing to me, except much more genuinely and eloquently than i could have ever written myself- and i cried in his arms as it sunk in once again how grateful i am that God put him in my life. he’s my soulmate, my future husband and the future father of our little babies- & that was the promise God gave me back in september. this boy is real and he cares and he leads me closer in my walk with Jesus every single day. He reminds me of God’s love for me in everything he does- he holds me when i cry so i don’t have to pretend George is doing it anymore. he makes me laugh and he thinks I’M funny, too. he brushes my hair and slow dances in the living room with me and proves to me every day that i am the opposite of a burden to him. God gave him to me as a smaller, imperfect reminder of His great, vast love for me, because the way God loves me can’t even compare to how my boy does. And God loves all of you the exact same way. i’m praying for all of you tonight, that you’ll let God show you that love he has for you, that you’ll genuinely open yourself up to the risky, scary, uncertain possibility of experiencing this dream of being loved in real life, but with God, you don’t have to be uncertain. His love is guaranteed, written in Jesus’ blood that was shed for you on the cross. it’s not like this book. it’s better. and with faith, you can let yourself feel it too. i love you all, and thank you for being there for me during the hardest time in my life. i’ll never forget you. -cal
