i hate my art. i waste hours drawing to improve my skills, trying to practice anatomy. just when i think i did a good job or be proud with myself, i look at other people's art and immediately get disappointed with what i drew earlier. i get really good ideas -at least in my view- and try to create them via drawing, but i either lose motivation and give up or draw until i finish just to see i've messed up. and it makes me extremely angry with myself. thinking that maybe i could bring those "ideas" to life by writing, i go on my pc again but it feels like i've lost all my writing skills, my english or my passion to write. i want to create a lot of short stories/drawings lately but i'm always lacking interest. i dont know what to do, i feel lost. i want to create more doors stuff MYSELF - i don't want to look at other people's work, but all that i can do is just play the game numbly since there's no choice left for me if i'm not going to do any those two things. and of course, just playing the game and not feeling passionate doesn't ease my need. i know that the more i think like this it will only get worse, i also know that if i feel proud with myself and embrace my skills and not compare myself to others i will manage to get higher to the way on success, but it's just not that easy. that's one of the reasons i recently stopped posting. i kind of want to isolate myself for a bit and get better.
