𝑷 𝒆 𝒂 𝒓 𝒍

Dear Future Wife,
          
          Just thought I'd share something with you.
          
          I tried using dating apps like Tinder and Bumble but sadly, I didn't get any matches.
          
          First of all, I barely have decent pictures of myself. Second, I don't really have any cool activities to show off. And third, well my face isn't exactly dating app material. But that's okay! I've come to terms with the fact that dating apps just aren't for me.
          
          I guess my wealth lies in my personality, rich in charm, poor in selfies.
          
          ______
          
          Dear Future Husband,
          
          I noticed you are searching me in those apps, wasting time to find me to meet.
          
          What to do, I never tried and used any dating apps, so you can't find me there. 
          
          Even though I don't have nice decent photos of myself, I like to find myself in me and same like that finding you in daily activities.
          
          I am not attractive, beautiful as you expect.
          
          My beauty, charm, cuteness lies in my personality and soul.
          
          Waiting for you to meet me with a smile instead of poor selfies.
          
          ________
          
          Just two random souls on Threads. 
          
          (Disclaimer: I didn't write this).

theme has my heart

After reading someone's note on insta recently got me thinking. It's on marriage, oh boy, I felt so seen and heard.
          
          He goes like, "I don't have a problem staying alone forever but what I am afraid of is to settle down eventually where I have to explain my passion instead of getting understood."
          
          And I go like, "forget about passion and feeling seen, can I even dare to dream and write?"
          
          He goes like, "There's no in-between. All I know is I will get everything or I will have nothing."
          
          I go like, "my bare minimum is the highest currency in this priceless world."
          
          He goes like, "There is no rush, but the day I will look into the eyes-my chaos will be settled, I will know, I'm finally home."
          
          And I go like, "Peace—I will feel the moment I will hold the right hand without any fear or judgment."
          
          ____________
          
          So of course yes, apart from this counter writing — I wrote a new poem, "On marriage boot camp." Give a read if your few seconds permit — 
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/1550111727-traveller%27s-heart-on-marriage-boot-camp

A new poem, 'My name in two' has been added in my latest poetry collection. Give a read if your few seconds permit —
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/1548962041-traveller%27s-heart-my-name-in-two

I have been in this space for a long time now that some things don't surprise me anymore, but it's saddening. 
          
          Yesterday, something happened on another platform which is the same case on every platform, even offline. And you would say, not every man etc etc. Yes, not all men but always a man. And you know what's the difficult part? You can spot the red flags outright. But what about the "good ones in disguise?" 
          
          You know what? It's subtle always. If you're having boundaries, then the shame is on you. You will hear the classic line, "Oh! It's not me. It's you, overthinking, overanalyzing. Boundaries? What's even that?" Instead of understanding your situation and taking no as an answer, you will be manipulated. You will be gaslighted into thinking that it's actually the fault in your thinking, not them.
          
          "You're just getting defensive for no reason. You're not GOD. Why should I work to earn your trust?" 
          
          Sure, then ever wonder maybe it's because of you she's afraid of getting approached now? Like I said, it comes with subtle warnings, but we, of course, get gaslighted into thinking that there's nothing wrong. A few phrases here and there, it's just a joke until it's not! 
          
          Before you come here with the propaganda, "But, Pearl! Kids shouldn't be online. Parents should be strict." Keep these phrases in your pocket. We're talking about full-blown adults. A woman's instinct can never go wrong. If she's saying no, the least you can do is respect her boundaries instead of you playing the defensive card here. 
          
          And it's not just limited to some corner. Imagine getting d*** pics and masturbation videos on your work email? Yes, it really happened. I don't wanna go into details of what's going on out there. 
          
          continued below—

Happy Birthday to you. Have a good one.

[ Content warning: Fire, death ]
          
          To be honest, I didn't want to write this post. Since I've been doing it since '22, I couldn't help but write it anyway.
          
          It's not a Spotify wrap-up; now you're asking me to wrap a year in a few words. Of course, I can't do it since I don't know when 2024 came and flew by already. Wasn't it 2023 just yesterday?
          
          But 2024 came, and I lied when I said I had no plans. Hey, nothing goes as you planned when there's a bigger plan for you after all.
          
          One of my plans was to write a novella/novel this year. Guess what? I didn't write any short stories, let alone a novel. And poetry? It's been slower than last year. I've written approximately 90 poems, uncountable prose pieces here and there, and I may publish my last poem of this year later.
          
          But this isn't the gist of this post. A year definitely slipped away from my hands; perhaps I am one step closer to my end. Yet this year brought clarity and lessons for me, as well as my lowest points in life.
          
          And December? It's been a haunting reminder of life. I experienced fire incidents twice in a row within a week. On top of that, I'm sure you have heard about the crashes in Kazakhstan, South Korea, and Canada.
          
          And we think that we have time—how funny is that. But life goes on, as do people. You'll be forgotten the next day you are gone. It's life; it's how it works. See the example of Gaza?
          
          I have lost and gained, but which triumphs over what—I don't know. December has been a dizzy state. All I know is that life is a fleeting illusion. Don't waste it on others, don't waste it on things that won't matter in the long run, just remember that you have to have yourself in this race.
          
          My best wishes for the upcoming year; may your dreams come true. After all, success lies in silence. You don't need to make noise for your efforts.

In my first year in the virtual world:
          At first, leaving a comment on any book seemed pointless—you would never get a reply, even when asking questions.
          
          Then one day, I left a comment and actually got a notification in my feed.
          
          That's when I realized this app wasn't just for popular writers. Long story short, I'm so grateful to have met people who helped me break free from my misguided assumptions. I say "misguided" because you'll find many people here who are too busy to respond to comments. 
          
          Yet, a famous author thanked me for adding their book to the public reading list, saying I had made their day! How wonderful was that feeling! Mind you, they had once been in the paid program.
          
          I observed how many writers were ghosting their readers, while others were so appreciative. Honestly, I learned from them. I learned not to waste my readers' time—I'm grateful for every second they spend on my average writing. After all, no one owes you anything here, not even if you write like Shakespeare.
          
          Scratch that last part. (I'll stop myself before saying something that might get me canceled later). My point is that when someone reads and appreciates your work, the least you can do is thank them. Show appreciation, and don't act dismissively if they wished you on your special day just because they're just strangers  (yes, this really happened).
          
          I'm thankful for the humility I learned from these writers. @Ajay-Kumar is one of them. Trust me, read, leave a hundred comments on his book, and he'll reply to each one. And his insightful perspective? He can find meaning in anything. 
          
          I'm nowhere near his skill level, but thank you so much for the sweet message, Ajay. Consider this a return gift, perhaps. You know I'm definitely ready to be your brand ambassador any day.
          
          Many of you may have already seen his work. But I urge you to read more of his writing. I'm signing off, leaving my favorite poem from his collection. 
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/1472881160-last-%7E-poetry-xoxo

Hey, I don't know how busy you are or whatever, but here is that short story that you inspired. It's called "I Saw You Golden" and I promise it's not about you.
          
          https://www.moonlitgetaway.com/short-fiction/i-saw-you-golden

So, how will you describe me even if you don't know me? I'm scattered in my writing, at the same time I ain't. So, to know me by my words? Don't give a try. But I would like to know, even if you have to describe me or my writing in three words, what will you choose? 
          
          I need some serious recommendation on books here. Although with this app, going in pitfall (I mean it was the same always), maybe we're getting wiser anyways, I'm thinking to give shout-out of underrated gems and few of my writer friends, they definitely deserve more. What do you think of it?