thechemicalstars

last post on here was in 2017....damn. no, i'm not really in contact with Christal or Sandra anymore, though I do see Christal liking posts or liking my posts sometimes on Instagram. Looking back at this account is bittersweet. So much happened, and yet things got worse. It's June 2020, and the BLM movement has taken over. And that's *good*. I'll talk about that later on, but for right now I'm just giving updates.
          So, if you hadn't already figured out, it's Sarah here. I was in 8th grade when I joined this account and now I'm a senior in high school. Isn't that freaking crazy??? I've gone through boyfriends and drama and crushes and homework and tears. These past three and a half years have been wild. I'm doing okay though, mentally. I'm bolder now, more assertive. I'm confident in who I am and who I will become. I'm happier. I'm better.
          As for Christal and Sandra, if you two ever happen to see this somehow, I love you both. We haven't spoken in years, but I love you both. I sincerely hope you two have healed and will continue healing, individually and in your friendship. Whatever happened, I'm so proud of you two and I have so much care for you two from being in this account with you both. I wish you both fulfilled and happy lives. Tomorrow, I'll dm you Christal and see how you're doing.
          Now, for the BLM movement. Everyone's heard by now of the lootings and the protests and the marches and the injustice that George Floyd and countless other black people faced. There is a revolution coming. Not now, but later. We are living in history right now. Victors get to write the history books, so we have to lift up the black community and make sure their voices get heard. Racism will not win.
          Below, I will link a carrd (which is like a link tree) of petitions, places you can donate, and how you can help from home.
          https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/
          If you go to protests and marches, be safe. Take proper precautions and don't go alone.
          I love you all.
          -- Sarah

Lol the password hasn't been changed yet bitches so guess who's back for one more second. I left pretty abruptly and now that I'm on speaking terms with Sandra and I'm less of a bitch (less of. I'm still a bitch. Can't change my personality) I figured I should give a brief explanation. I'M DRAMATIC AS YOU CAN SEE BY THE SUDDEN UPPERCASE. I stopped going on this account for multiple reasons. 1) I was extremely bitter and upset about something that had happened in my personal life involving Sandra. 2) I haven't been writing anything in a really long time and I just sorta lost my passion, which is depressing but its what happens sometimes. 3) I stopped hiding behind Wattpad. I was genuinely obsessed about this app and it killed me, so at one point I deleted it and I just now redownloaded it so I could check on my other account. Since then, I've joined a sport!!!! And an AP class. Lol yay. I'm pretty much the same, but my moods change every 10 minutes so that's not saying much. I feel okay. I want to say that I'm doing better, but I'm doing about the same. Some days are better than others. Overall, I'm the same Christal, but I'm also really different. I think its a good different, I mean I hope so. I'm still my bitchy, antisocial, coffee-drinking self though. Okay, that's all I have to say for now. I'm going to delete this app again, but who knows, I might check in every once in awhile just to see how everyone's doing. Bye guys.
          
          Christal

          This sinking feeling sets,
          It feels just like a hole inside your chest.
          I know you're thinking,
          No, no, no, no, it is easier said than done,
          But please let me attest.
          I know it's hard.
          You're feeling like you're trapped,
          But that's how you react,
          When you cannot see the light.
          But try and see the light.
          I'm tellin' you,
          No, no, no, no,
          You're the only one
          Standing in your way,
          Just take a breath, relax, and tell me…
          
          Why?
          Please tell me why do we worry?
          Why?
          Why do we worry at all?
          Why?
          Just tell me why do we worry?
          When worry is never helping tell me
          Why?
          Why worry at all?
          
          Why do we insist,
          On crossing bridges that do not exist?
          Let's take these issues
          Step by step by step, to work it out,
          Day by day by day we're falling down,
          But life goes on.
          I've got some questions,
          Are you sick of feelin' sorry?
          Uh huh,
          And people sayin' not to worry?
          Uh huh,
          Sick of hearing this hakuna matata motto,
          From people who won the lotto,
          We're not that lucky.
          Have you noticed that you're breathing?
          Uh huh,
          Look around and count your blessings,
          Uh huh,
          So when you're sick of all this stressin' and guessin' I'm suggestin' you turn this up and let them hear you sing it.
          
          Why?
          Please tell me why do we worry?
          Why?
          Why do we worry at all?
          Why?
          Just tell me why do we worry?
          When worry is never helping tell me
          Why?
          Why worry at all?
          
          Chin up, quit actin' like you're half dead.
          Tears can only half fill how you’re feelin'.
          Don't worry, be happy baby.
          Stand up, life is too damn short,
          That clock is ticking.
          Man up, if ya feel me,
          Everybody sing it.
          
          Why?
          Please tell me why do we worry?
          Why?
          Why do we worry at all?
          Why?
          Just tell me why do we worry?
          When worry is never helping tell me
          Why?
          Why worry at all?
          
          Why?
          Please tell me why do we worry?
          Why?
          Why do we worry at all?
          Why?
          Just tell me why do we worry?
          When worry is never helping
          I'm not buying what they're selling
          So if worry's never helping tell me
          Why,
          Why?
          Worry at all?

Hey guys, it's me Sandra. I know it's shocking. I was the most inactive one on the account. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for being inactive. Things happened you know? Either I kept forgetting the password or I would remember it but then I would forget to log on or either life just got in the way. Something always happened.  I remember the first couple days being on the account. Christal texted me saying something like "wanna be on a group account with me and a friend?" and I was excited you know! Like yay group account!!! And so you know I logged on and did my bio thingy thing thing. But then I was going down hill. Not just with the account, but my personal self. I made choices that I shouldn't have done. I regret them 100% but you know, I shouldn't have done them in the first place. I lost friends along the way and I was sad but there was no one to blame but myself. You know. I was scared but I didn't know how to exactly fix things. I became someone I didn't want to. Everything is thankfully better now though! Life is bearable. I still smile and send my friends random Spongebob lyrics. I am content with life. I did my best to become friends with the people I had ruined the friendship with. I'm living life. Breathing, eating, sleeping, you know, all that. School is the usual blah. Um, that's basically it. I'm sorry about the account though, I did have fun while it lasted though. Just realized I said "though" twice but I'm not gonna go back and fix it because I am too lazy too. Yes, I am weird like that. 

This account is really...devastating. Although this account has been around for less than a year, you can really see the toll time has taken on all of us. Sandra is never active and Christal is who knows where, but I really hope both of them are okay. But if you scroll waaaay back down to the bottom of these conversations...it's funny how we changed so drastically. I'm amazed at the person I was then. I was...happy? I was goofy? I was silly and fun and bright and saw a future???? Idk..we all were just...somewhat happy. And then we weren't.
          I guess that's life. 
          I might pop into this account every once in awhile to write a poem, but other than that, I won't. 
          My emotional state is slightly better. 
          I mean, I'm happy, but it feels like a fake happy. Like I'm being forced, but it's all natural. It's hard to explain. It's sorta like an out of body experience..just watching yourself smile and be happy and laugh when deep down, you know you're not. 
          I can't say exactly, but Christal is going through a rough time. If by any chance she's reading this, I love you. You're a great person and we never really talked actually but this account was fun while it lasted. I'm glad I met you, and you made an impact in my life. You matter. 
          Sandra, if you ever log on and read this, you're a cool person! I never actually talked with you I don't think, but I'm sure you're a really neat person. Stay strong, love. 
          I guess this is my final good-bye. I'll be on my other account (@SaigeBride) but other than that, I'll be a ghost. 
          If I'm being honest, writing just doesn't have the same effect as it once did and I miss that badly. Maybe I need time, maybe I need sleep. Who really knows?
          Summer is here, but I am not. 
          So long and farewell ~
          -- Sarah

Hey everyone. I'm done with this account. I had a really emotional explanation but I deleted it because I'm self conscious and paranoid. Thank you to all of our followers. I have deleted all my stories, drafts, and my entries in the all about us book. I'm really sorry but I don't want to explain again, so this is it. Thank you for supporting me and my writing on this account. I will be on my other one probably not very often. But it's okay, it happens. So this is it for me on this account. Bye everyone. 
          
          -Christal

hey, it's sarah here. i'm trying to get back into the swing of things now that school is finally (((F I N A L L Y))) wrapping up
          
          it's been a tough one for me and i'm proud of myself for getting through it
          i've gotten rid of toxic friends and i found the one person ((my best friend!!!)) who chooses me 
          she chooses me first
          not because that's what best friends are supposed to do
          but because she cares for me that much
          and that's why we're best friends
          
          i'm sorta happier??? i mean, i've met some truly amazing people in the past couple months who made my self esteem skyrocket a teensy bit and i've found solace in music again
          
          also: music.
          it's still my saviour
          i've been offered all these gigs because of my piano skills, and i'm honestly??? wow??? thank?? i'm so honored
          
          maybe i'll even post of a video of me playing :)))

Hey I'm offering to make covers for my followers if you want on DM let me know :) 

Sorry I haven't been on lately. It's not gonna change anytime soon, I apologize. I thought about completely quitting this account but I decided against it. That's it for now, bye guys. 
          
          Christal

I'm not sure what's going on with Sandra and Christal, but school is really tieing me down. I haven't been active at all on Wattpad, not on my account, not on this one. 
          I've been struggling a lot with personal problems, but don't worry, I have great friends to help me deal with them. 
          Also: I've just lost interest in a lot of things, one of them including writing. I'm not sure if I'll ever be interested in it for a while, but until then, peace. 
          - Sarah <3