SnixxFabgay

I need to stop getting all here ideas and inspiration for books like I’m trying to write a Riverdale book which is still in my drafts because I want to write pre chapters like always but now I’ve started writing a PLL book like and both shows are so long

I literally made a Choni edit video but I’m literally too much of a wuss to upload it Strangers by Halsey and Lauren Jauregui literally remind me so much of them and that’s the song I used 

I hate that I thought things were changing. I had been forced to come out in front of a whole hall during my exams when I was just 14 because of a crush I had on a girl. I’d finally come to terms with who I was and that i was attracted to girls the way I should’ve been attracted to boys but wasn’t. I thought people who were my friends supported me for who I was and didn’t care but recently it looks to be the opposite. The past year I’ve tried to let it slip but I can’t find myself to do that anymore. I’ve been forced back into the closet and claimed it was just a phase I was going through since I’m just a teenager and was just experimenting. The things people have said to me for being gay really hit hard. I just finished an episode on S7 Riverdale but felt butterflies in my stomach and shivers after I seen Cheryl and Toni kissing in the locker rooms and it makes myself wonder if it’s normal to feel that way? Should I be feeling butterflies and shivers when I see one of my favourite couples kissing? Maybe I am going through a phase and I am just straight. I don’t know who I am anymore and it hurts to not know. My friends telling me why can’t I just be like them and like boys? Why do I always talk about girls? Am I really into girls because I haven’t been seen with one or being in a proper relationship with one. I feel ashamed of who I am. This app is the only place I feel safe but I feel guilty and wrong for feeling the way I do about girls rather than boys. I tried telling myself and my friends that I was into both boys and girls so it would at least seem a little normal and I even started texting boys in a relationship way but it doesn’t make me feel anything. I lie about who I am because I feel ashamed. Maybe it is a phase for me but all I know is that I feel guilty, ashamed and don’t know who I am :/

These Riverdale pre chapters take so long to write but I’m not giving up because I swore to myself I would write this book and hell I’m not going to have hours I’ve spent wasted. They just take soooo long (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞

Am I the only one who genuinely just wanted Drea and Eleanor to get together in Do Revenge but Drea and Russ were like so cute at the same time

Although I LOVE Riverdale but Archie on his own and facing against the ghoulies for a fight because he found out he’s basically invincible always makes me laugh because he just looks so dumb and cringes me out.
          

Toni Topaz S2, 3, 4, 7 >>>>> no lie they were her best seasons. They ruined her character a little bit in S5 and 6 but S7 made up for any faults Toni may of had. 

I’m so mad that we never got to see if Cheryl and Toni ended up together in their own time. Like ik they ended up together in the 50s but the whole point of Cheryl’s development was to fix her family and ancestors problems and doings so she could be ridded of the blossom curse she thought she had. Cheryl spent years redoing her family’s wrongs into rights the best she could and she broke up with Toni so she wouldn’t get between her and her nana. And then we don’t even know if they end up together in their OWN time. If they were truly meant to be together in THEIR time.
          
          Idk I can be confusing when explaining things soz. 

Istg Wattpad keeps logging me out whenever I close the app and I have to log back in and wait for everything to set back up like what am I supposed to do because it’s quite annoying having to log back in every hour and having to wait 

I’m writing The Strangers obviously with my own ocs but I’m literally listening to to total eclipse of the heart while writing it. Like there’s no other song that hits like that in The Strangers.