Sm0lb3tch

Guys, sometimes in my native language a cousin more distant than a second cousin is called "Sugar cousin"
          
          It's not exactly common, but I've heard people use it before

I think my sister is in her "I'm not like other girls" phase

A lovely conversation I had qith my dear mother ten minutes ago:
          
          Mom: "Today is the last day those pancakes are good, so you'll have to eat them all today."
          
          Me: "Got it. Dad's message seemed like an order lol."
          
          Mom: "It was. You'll eat every single one of those pancakes or you won't go to bed. And if you do, you'll wake up in the middle of the night with me standing next to your bed with those pancakes."
          
          Me: "Okay, lol."
          
          Mom: "Like how you've woken me up before."
          
          Me: "What?"
          
          Mom: "You were around three, and I woke up in the middle of the night with you standing next to our bed on my side like in a horror movie. You didn't even say anything, you just stood there and stared at me."
          
          Me: "Oh lol, sorry."
          
          Mom: "I couldn't see anything and I had just woken up, and I see this figure just standing next to me. You scared me so badly I nearly karate chopped you."

Real things my friend has said:
          
          "I want glow in the dark boobs."
          
          And
          
          "I ate five homeless people because I thought they were watermelons."

My english teacher wore a Spy x family t shirt today

@ Sm0lbetch  but seriously you gotta be more careful 

I fell down the stairs again lol

So yesterday I forgot to turn on my alarm before going to bed
          
          My alarm was (supposed to be) set at 6:00. I woke up at 5:30.
          
          Why? Because I had a dream that someone was trying to wake me up

My phone somehow downloaded Block Blast on it's own idk how
          
          My phone has some parental controls, so I need a parent's permission for my phone to even download any app- HOW THE HELL DID MY PHONE JUST IGNORE ALL OF THAT

heyyyyyyy