Inactive account

Raghhhhhhh my streams don’t work audio rn

Hey, ima be switching from wattpad to Tumblr mostly, so if you do wanna rp or chat just know my user is still @theinkbunny

(I had a beta male moment, forgive me)

(Tw: kinda a vent
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          I’m so stressed out and dissociated, I can barely focus on anything, my life feels like a monotonous machine, I get so overwhelmed by the smallest changes in my day, I’m fighting to find who I am, fighting to stay strong for the people around me, but it’s getting hard to not break. There’s so many people out there who think I’m so strong and so happy and living my best life- but I’m so scared. I’m scared that I’m not enough. I’m scared that my future holds no weight, like it’ll just float away. I have no escape from this. But I need to stay strong, I HAVE to stay strong, if not for me than for everyone else. Every single day I’m haunted by the memories of my past, sitting in the councilors office slowly slipping out of reality as I have to be the one to report my ex’s attempted suicide to my school. That feeling of achy guilt and fear will never leave me, and the only reason I haven’t bothered to do anything about my trauma is because none of it feels real. I am convinced I’m in a dream, part of it feels real sometimes but nothing can pull me out of this. I feel fucking hopeless. I don’t want to say anything about it to anyone because there’s so much worse going on in the world, but that’s just the point, the world is the reason I’m slipping away…the world is the reason I forget that I exist, i feel like everything is terrible and even the most beautiful things are just an enigma, lost to time meant to slip through our fingers. I hate being a human, I hate this, but I have to be strong…because I don’t want to end my life not being fully here, not being present to watch my little brother grow up, not watching my parents retire, not getting to hold my partner in my arms and have my first kiss. If I end it all now, what will my life have been worth? I’ve done nothing of value yet…and I can’t end it all here, not yet…maybe by the time I’ve done something I’ll be happy again, but for now…I can’t be anything but upset.

(I do rp in DMs more often than I rp on my message boards- sooooo- hmu any time)

(Help I just got a Lowe’s add in the middle of listening to an NSFW audio on Spotify- omg)

(When you drink an energy drink
          Accident subscribe to your ex on YouTube after checking his account for 2.5 seconds as a joke
          Listen to your girlfriend cry herself to sleep unable to comfort her
          And then lay there awake trying to distract yourself by all means necessary
          
          That’s how you know it’s truly a Monday.)

(IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK THAT I WISH TO LAY IN BED WITH MY BOO AND SNUGGLE HER UNTIL SHE DIES???)

// okay but we should totally get the girls back together-

(Boobies)