Suicidal fan girl forever

I am in sixth grade, and go to Sunnyside. I am in the excel program and I love the divergent series. My friend Sofia says I am obsessed with it. My favorite color is green, and my favorite food is Broccoli and ranch.

My favorite poem is:
I stopped looking for monsters under my bed when I realized they where inside me.  

Okay, time for the serious part. I suffer from depression and anxiety disorder. I am dark and evil in my own way, you could say. I think things that would never cross the ordinary persons mind. I think about killing myself and others, and when I'm angry enough, I kill people on paper. That means writing stories that lots of people die in. That's why I'm so dark and gloomy. Don't mistake me for an emo, just cause I'm depressed doesn't mean I'm a freaking emo. I didn't choose to be depressed, Emos choose to be Emos. I don't want to be depressed, I just am. If I had it my way, I wouldn't even be on this planet right now. I don't want your sympathy, I want your help. Meaning if I ask for feedback and give the reason I suffer from depression, I don't want any of this May god be with you, or Jesus Christ is on his way. I know where I stand, and that is right in the middle of the atheists. Along with my two best friends. If it did exist though, I'd be on a straight plummet down to hell. I am far from a good person, and I know that. I hope you would would give me feed back on my song. It meant so much to me that I actually posted it on watt pad, before I let my family see it. My dad thinks I'm broken, and he tries to fix me, but it just won't work. I feel things differently. Where most of you would go down to a party on a Friday night, I lay in my bed at home, or read a book. I hate the outdoors. I hope no one asks me to do anything, and I especially don't want to move when I'm even the slightest bit upset. I know some people think that depression is a huge battle or something, but it's not. I just don't do things like a normal person would do them.
-sfgfe