Novensiles

Just found out I have two great grandparents who-one, served in the war of WW11 but manage to dip out of there and moved to Mexico while the other moved to America. So that's cool to know. (Also two of my great/2x are possibly Irish??)
          I got a strange family tree it seems. (●'◡'●)
          
          Hallo everybody, guten tag (I am inspired to learn my German heritage)
          It has been crazy for me these last months, summer-I hate summer. Yes, I am sadly venting but I won't go so much into the details besides the fact I had entered into a wallowing depression era at some point that inflicted on myself in both mind and physicality. I am recovering, just apparently a bad habit of self-negativity that did involve heavily with my own writing.
          
          I do have a terrible tendency to demean myself with my own works of writing-and believe it or not, it caused me to wallow in depression of my own self worth and completely leave wattpad without saying anything. I hardly read anymore or look at my own writing. I was told by a helpful partner (not love interest) to just take a step back, no more-just rest. To bring my time to those around and enjoy summer. Job hunting had been a stress as well and I like to believe in some ways it only had a negative impact on my worth with my writing.
          
          I know my creativity is strong-that it is alive and always with me even when I don't want it to. I pour the need to write, to plan, to invest . . . but it drowns my at times and I forget to breathe. Or that I can breathe. Just a moment, even for a second, and just breathe.
          
          My head is not completely in the game, but I am back, and with something profound in me, I will be back on track with my writings. As well those books I have yet to read.
          
          This is Novensiles, the MasksOfALiar, soon signing back onto wattpad to finish what they started. Guten tag, meine freunde.
          
          
          
          
          
          ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
          
          Also, anyone else is getting loads of notifications by wattpad liking their comments on several stories? Wattpad is this a glitch-?

Renewal is the ideal. As time goes on, I change drastically at will- fitting for my treasure and despises. I will only follow from story interests; I want only peace in my space.
          From being away for more than a week, I had a lot of notifications, I read still but didn't bother to look. After binge reading on the greatest stories, I ever came across- invested like it was a drug, I took some time to myself and realized I needed to change... to become the person I wish to be on wattpad and around others. But I also didn't want any more connections- I can hardly keep up that flood around like traffic with talks of life and problems.
          When I came to wattpad, it was to escape reality- not be dragged into others. Not to be reminded of my own life and lives I know.
          Perhaps I don't fill like I have been given enough attention, or maybe the me that is broken shouts in statements that I am heartless- that I don't care for others as I make myself out to because... It was fun to get to know another, even if that life only last for a second.
          *Sighs*
          
          [To my wives]
          I am not looking for anything after I post this, I feel nothing I suppose. My wives, my dear friends. As to put this the easiest way possible- I did want to do many things with you, I want that lovely feeling even if it is false, I want that time we share like we did months ago, but. I can no longer see past in the lies I spin like nature. *Breathes* In other words our platonic relationship that I am in with you, you may consider me an old shadow. I wish nothing the best to each and every one of you. And ask for the forgiveness of promises I gave without consideration of the fact, I, would be the one to break apart and become the lair I dreamed I would never be. I hope we can be mutual between each other, though I feel nothing at the moment writing this down, I know it will sink and I will drown. When and if we do converse, I might let an apology slip out of regret or pity, please ignore it because I wish not to face it.