Emma Elraih

I just told the group of people I'm with that I've never seen The Princess bride and they said that that needs to be fixed. and now I feel like Karkat for some reason.

GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS! I'M IN THE HOMESTUCK DISCORD GROUP AND I JUST REALIZED THEY HAVE ANNOUNCED THAT HIVESWAP ACT 2 IS IN ACTIVE DEVELOPMENT!!! THEY'RE NOT ANNOUNCING A RELEASE DATE BUT I'M STILL FREAKING OUT! (sry if this is old news but I'm rolling around in my bed from this) 

I'm sitting in the school hallway. Sitting with my bag full of boxes of cupcakes I made yesterday for my class. All of them have said at least once that they hate me. Bitches better like this tradition I'm doing. 

aaand it's my b-day today. yay me.

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OKAY NO. NO NO NO. I CANT FUCKING DO THIS ANYMORE. I'VE REACHED MY FUCKING LIMIT AND I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE! I DONT WANNA DO THIS ANYMORE. IM DONE. I DONT WANNA GO BACK. THAT FUCKING IDIOT- I DONT WANNA  SEE HIM. IM JUST SO DONE

Omigod i have 69 followers OwO

LADIES AND GENTLETROLLS, BOYS 'N GIRLS! IT IS 4/13! LET'S ALL GIVE A HONK FOR OUR LORD AND SAVIOR WHO BROUGHT US HOMESTUCK: ANDREW HUSSIE!!!!!!!! 

I am about to be awake for 36 hours straight. 

Okay, sorry but I just need to vent a bit.
          I feel like there's something so fucking wrong with me. If I get mad it feels like my insides are being squeezed and it makes me wanna do something bad. Last time it happened I was so close to stabbing a pen in a girls hand. She had just made me so mad. I feel like there's something wrong with me. My emotions skyrocket, but its only negative emotions such as anger, stress, sadness, and anger. But it just FUCKING ESCALATES SO FUCKING MUCH! IT FEELS LIKE IM GOING TO GO FUCKING MAD. But yet I keep a straight face and it's fucking breaking me! I don't know how long it'll be before I do something bad or something I'll regret. I have had thoughts of slapping my mom, punching annoying people, screaming at teachers and parents. This mask I'm wearing is making me go mad. I'm so annoyed and EVEN FUCKING NOW I FEEL SOMETHING SO FUCKING ANNOYING IN ME. I feel like a fucking failure. I've failed 2 math tests already and gotten a shitty score in a language test. I feel so fucking agitated and stressed about it. 
          Most people don't know but I really want to be an architect. But what's the fucking point if your own parents say that "with these scores, there's no way you would be able to become an architect". It makes me so fucking mad that I want to cry. But I've built up a fucking persona that makes me seem like an independent strong person, so much so that I refuse to let myself show sadness and cry. Every time I do I just feel so fucking weak or as a disappointment. Even more, is that I refuse to talk to other people about it. So I bottle up my emotions and try to sweep them under the rug. and I don't know how long I can keep that up. Every time I have spoken to adults, for example about school like: "How do you feel about school?" "How is it going?" They somehow manage to make me almost cry, not because of what they said but because of other things... I don't even remember...
          Sorry to anyone reading this one... just needed to vent a bit