jeankirsteinmainb
The movie is out
DonatekkRivera
jeankirsteinmainb
Idk if you're still here but the ballad of songbirds and snakes trailer is out wjlwndbsqkwwnwmma
DonatekkRivera
@baecanread damn it's been a while since I've gotten an email from Wattpad I'm not really still here but I just watched it, and it looks awesome
DonatekkRivera
"When people thought the Earth was flat, they were wrong. When people thought the Earth was spherical they were wrong. But if you think that thinking the Earth is spherical is just as wrong as thinking the Earth is flat, then your view is wronger than both of them put together."
-Issac Asimov, The Relativity of Wrong
jeankirsteinmainb
When an orphan takes a selfie it's called a family photo
jeankirsteinmainb
@baecanread Don't worry, if you ever go to hell I'll be at the gate selling hotdogs. I booked my spot since I logged unto tiktok
DonatekkRivera
Police are investigating the disappearance of a northern city in England; there's no Leeds.
jeankirsteinmainb
Which part of your body always loses?
DonatekkRivera
@baecanread a few years back I just made a ludicrous effort to remember all sorts of riddles and dad jokes. Never to use them, but to sound smart when I know the answer.
jeankirsteinmainb
You want to know where I store all my dad jokes?
......in a dad-a-base
DonatekkRivera
I went to a zoo with only one dog.
It was a shi tzu.
DonatekkRivera
@baecanread Yeah, I just find these random places or are told them by people. This one is one of the better "dad joke" style ones.
DonatekkRivera
I want a closed casket funeral.
However, nearing the end of the service, I want the organist to slowly play "Pop Goes the Weasel" until everyone attending is waiting on the edge of their seat, in silent, morbid anticipation.
DonatekkRivera
The aquarium doesn't charge campers or dolphins for admission. So for all in tents and porpoises, it's free.