怕黑的苦力怕

So…Long time no see I guess? I’m here to announce that I will officially discontinue my Zoro x reader one shots book. The reason I will be discontinuing it is that I like writing long stories instead of one shots. But fret not! An ending means that a new beginning will be here! After I finished taking the HKDSE(it is an important exam because it decide whether I can enter the UGC- funded universities), which is around late-May, I will be writing a new book! There’s a few fandom for you to choose and please comment which fandom you want to see me writing!
          List: 
          One Piece, Hypnosis Mic, Twisted Wonderland, JoJo, My Hero Academia, Saiki Kuso, Kimetsu no Yaiba

I don’t know will I be able to update or even go onto Wattpad later on. As China is planning to implement a sweeping national security law for Hong Kong. Please spread the news to people you know, Hong Kong needs help now. Please let people know what CCP is trying to do to Hong Kong. CCP keeps on assaulting the freedom and democracy of HongKongers. #SaveHongKong #SOSHK #HongKongNeedsHelp

Hope everyone is healthy! Take good care of yourself! I may update the 'Zoro x reader one shots' in this few days, as now the Corona virus is now spreading among the whole world and I've stayed home for a long time already. I will try to write as much as I can, as there's still a few game I am playing is holding an event and the characters or things I can get is either characters I like or things I needed. If I can't update. the other reason is that my depression now is being very unstable and it's a big problem for me. Since I may be doing things, then suddenly I will want to self-harm, or lose all the motivation to do anything.

So...I’m considering discontinue the ‘Zoro x reader one shots’ book now. As I’m busier and I don’t have that much of time to update. The book will be in the status of on hold until I have time and interest in writing the book. But later on I may start a new book which is an original story.

So...I'm trying my best to update now.
          
            I know I haven't update in ages, but yeah, my mental health hasn't improved at all. And the current situation in Hong Kong is just adding more and more stress, which is not helping me at all. I always lost all my motivation for doing anything suddenly, but don't worry, I won't discontinue my book!
          
            I'm so tired of pretending that I'm okay in front of everyone...By the way, if I decided to commit suicide, I will tell you guys first, so don't worry!
          
            P.S. I just watched One Piece STAMPEDE today and I was fangirling the whole time XD The whole movie is so cool!

  I know, I haven't update in ages and I deeply apologize for it.
            
            Today I want to have a serious talk with everyone, it's about the current situation in Hong Kong. Now, people are not only fighting for the future of Hong Kong, but the future of the world. I know this may sound ridiculous but in fact, the impacts brought by the extradition are unpredictable, we don't know what the Chinese government will do, so I hope everyone can take this seriously.
          
            You may be wondering what is the extradition thing talking about and why people is taking a stand against it. The extradition will establish a mechanism for transfers of fugitives not only for Taiwan (a homicide case happened there and it is related to Hong Kong people), but also for  Mainlandand China and Macau, which are not covered in the existing laws. Whenever the Chinese government think you as a fugitive and you take a step into Hong Kong, sorry, you will be arrested. We don't know what the Chinese government will do, maybe torture or maybe brainwash you. People worried that the fugitives will not be treated in a human way. Also, people worried that the mainland China will grab this chance and turn Hong Kong into China#2, so people are strongly disagree with this extradition.
          
            Please spread this message to others and let them know more about the extradition. I just want to raise people's awareness about the extradition. If you want to know more information, you can search it online, many news and pictures could be seen.
          
          

  Finally...I'm charged off from the hospital. I can go to school tomorrow *٩(๑´∀`๑)ง*

  So...I just went to the hospital and I have to stay there so...I can't write for this few days. I will tell you guys when I can get out.

  Why can't I just die... It hurts, everything hurts... Pretending that I'm fine, that I am smiling, that I am happy. 
            I hate it. 
            Why I have to be so fake. Telling everyone I am fine while I'm not. Pretending that I'm not hurt by what they said. Forced to keep all my thoughts and emotion to myself. Why is it so hard to find a point of living? Just because someone will be 'unhappy', so I have to pretend that I'm fine? Just because someone is sad so I have to listen to everything they said and comfort them?
            I know, I am a 'good listener', at least that's what everyone see me as. But it doesn't mean I am happy, right? Everyone ask for my suggestion when someone is sad, but what about me? No one ever listen to me, no one wants to hear me out.
            Why am I so stupid? Keep on doing things I don't want to, things that others told me to do, keep on trusting lies they told me.
            I just want to disappear from this world. I hate it. I hate how I have to telling myself that I will not have any chance to be with that girl. Seeing her in my dream nearly everyday, seeing her with her other friends while smiling happily. It really hurts my feeling. No comforting words when I am feeling down, not being here with me when I need her the most.
            I really want to kill myself right now, I think I am near the breaking point of my emotions, again.
            Can I just die? I am a burden to everyone anyways. I am so useless anyway.

  So...I need sometime to recover. I just confessed to the girl I love today(Does anyone remember that I am a bisexual). And I got rejected, although I prepared for rejection already, but still, it really hurts my feeling. And I heard some parents told their children that homosexual are monsters, although I am not a homosexual but I just confessed to a girl today and I got rejected, it really hurts me to hear someone saying that. I know they are not doing this on purpose but still, it hurts, it hurts so much, to the point that I nearly break down on the street.(In case anyone of you don't know, in Chinese, especially elderly, they hate homosexual and bisexual, they think it is a sin, my mum even told me that she will disown me if I date a girl.)