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when is ur story coming up 

this year seem to be my downfall.
          
          not even my own friends care HAHAHAHAHAHA

imagine writing a fanfic in math class

hi once again !
          welcome to another vent post cuz uhm thats rlly my purpose for being here anyway so-
          
          uhm i feel like i might repeat the same shit ive said in the previous post but like idrc cuz its a vent anyways 
          
          so uhm to start out, im currently experiencing a migraine again, i mean its not surprising but still
          
          and sometimes my migraines happen so frequently atp where i have to take frequent breaks from sch just to rest my heavy ass head
          
          and for that particular reason, i miss a lot of sch days and when i come back, im basically a hopeless case there. i cant catch up to everyone i just feel like im being left behind. this sounds pathetic i get it but
          
          atp i genuinely cant help myself anymore. ive talked to a counsellor, they cant do shit. ive talked to my mom, she cant do shit. ive talked to my friends, they cant do shit. ive talked to everyone that could possibly help me escape this endless cycle of heaviness and yet not a single person can help me. sometimes i wonder how it would be like if i had the freedom to just go out and have fun without a single ounce of care. ngl thats smth i will forever pray and hope for. its like im in a bottle yk. everyone is moving forward and living on with their life while im in this small ass bottle, prolly sealed with gorilla glue or smth. anyways uhh i need to go now uhm if u acc botthered to read this and the other ones uhm i honestly dk what to say HAHAH bye !

hello so uhm im back again to vent out whatever shit that has happened these past few weeks so-
          
          im genuinely like, really exhausted with everything and to say that there's no one to comfortably rant it out to, i decided to go here instead since- barely anyone would actually visit this page and bother reading this.
          
          so, i'll just get straight to the point. i feel damn numb with everything. i don't even know if im tired, sad, mad or just completely crazy; but one thing i know is, im mentally fucked up in the head alr. i just cant seem to think straight anymore, i cant get my shit together, i cant force myself to put in effort in anything anymore. my mind doesnt want to give up but my body does. im physically still here but im mentally out of this world. i seriously dont know what to do with life anymore. im not saying i dont appreciate it though. i appreciate that god gave me life and all but, i wish he had given it someone who deserves it more. at this point, i just regret all the things i did to others, hurting them with my words and not showing my appreciation enough. i also regret for troubling my mom every single damn time cuz she has to keep handling my dumb ass and i admit im not really a good sister to my brother at all. all i do nowadays is just spit curses at him
          even if he didnt do anything wrong. i feel like no matter how many friends i have, i'll still feel so goddamn lonely and feel inferior every time im around them. i feel paranoid every time and keep thinking what would others think of me.
          
          this may seem like your usual vent post that you see but seriously. i'm genuinely suffocating. whoever bothered to actually read all this, uhm i got nothing else left to say. i spat all the things i needed to type out and i'm glad. even if it was just one person reading this, at least i know i let out all overwhelming thoughts. dont overthink this though. im not trying to kill myself or anything. im just exhausted, that's all.
          
          bye !

HELP WHY DOES MY MOTHER'S FRIENDS LIKES SHIPPING ME WITH THEIR 18 YEAR SONS-
          
          no cuz like two of my mom's friends visited us today AND BOTH OF THEM LEGIT CALLED ME DAUGHTER IN LAW AND IM LIKE WHAT DO YALL SEE IN ME- and they were like "oh bcs youre so respectful and polite and elegant" AND IN MY MIND I WAS LIKE NAH BRO IM JUST BEING SHY THATS ALL IM REALLY NOT WHAT YOU THINK THEN MY MOM BEING A TYPICAL SNEAKY MOM, HAD THE AUDACITY TO AGREE WITH THEM EVEN THOUGH SHE KNOWS DAMN WELL I DONT SWING THAT WAY THEN I WENT TO MY ROOM TO QUIETLY PUNCH ON RANDOM OBJECTS THAT DID NOTHING WRONG THEN I WENT BACK OUT AND SAID "ok if yall want me to date your sons then show me how they look first" CUZ IF YALL SO DAMN DESPERATE WHY NOT SHOW ME HOW THEY LOOK LIKE FIRST SO I CAN DO SOME RESEARCH, THEN THEY ACTUALLY SHOWED ME HOW THEY LOOK AND I SAID, "excuse me maam, ur sons are completely gorgeous fellas and i know damn well i dont deserve such perfection-" THEN THEY WENT ON COMPLEMENTING ME AND TRYING TO CONVINCE ME TO TALK TO THEM, TO INITIATE CONVERSATIONS WITH THEM, AND TO LIKE BE FRIENDS WITH THEM FIRST AND IN MY HEAD I WAS LIKE NAH BRO THE EXPECTATIONS YOU HAVE IN MY SOCIAL SKILLS IS JUST NAHH SO I SAID BUT IDK HOW TO START A CONVO AND IM AWKWARD BUT THEN THEY WERE LIKE OH NO ISSOK HONEY OUR SONS ARE ALSO SHY ASF AND A HOMEBODY LIKE YOU AND DEEP INSIDE I GENUINELY FELT LIKE SHOVING A CROISSANT UP MY NOSTRILS.
          
          ok thats all hahahdhehdbn bye.

hi so uhm you see-
          
          ive been very busy lately ... busy procrastinating actually.
          
          and i really think its starting to get serious cuz like i just dont have the will to keep going anymore and i just uhm yea.
          
          so like since its june holidays over here, my insomniac ass has kicked jn and ive been regularly sleeping after 7am and before 10am and im well aware that is very unhealthy but still im on the edge and i cant do anything abt it.
          
          anygays dont mind me! just felt like venting it out here since i doubt anyone would check my acc just to see what im up to so uhm yea bye hhahsbnc

OMG MY BIRTHDAY TODAY VERY CHAOTIC SIA 

so like- i realised that it's already been one month and yet ALL THE BOOKS THAT HAS BEEN DUSTING UP IN MY DRAFTS FOR LIKE 4 YEARS (?) ARE NOT EVEN FINISHED CUZ I HAVE BEEN TO BUSY PROCRASTINATING  i hate myself .

so like i just came back from school and im really really drained out and here i am hiding in my room with my younger bro cuz my dad came out of nowhere and started confronting my mom about issues. my mom on the other hand is just adding more fuel to the fire HAHS