ButterbowlXD
shout out to @EllasDamBees_ and @xxJakeWebber ❤️❤️ These people gotta be the nicest and silliest people in the world
ButterbowlXD
ButterbowlXD
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In a puddle of my tears rn, still crying over fucking food.
ButterbowlXD
in asia, it was june 11 yesterday. but in USA AMERICA️️its only june 11, but today in asia its 12th
ButterbowlXD
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My fatass is crying over a fucking cake
ButterbowlXD
Life update : still a crybaby
ButterbowlXD
I cry too much
xxJakeWebber
@ButterbowlXD but thats because ur emotional, but emotional isnt a bad thing, and sometimes its irrational but like crying is valueable and proves u care
ButterbowlXD
@xxJakeWebber i do. Everyday i can't go without crying about something stupid. i was on a 3 hour rant with my friend on video call and i was just sad about SNAKES DON'T HAVE ARMSS THEY CAN'T HUG ANYONEE
ButterbowlXD
I have been living a lie.
xxJakeWebber
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@ButterbowlXD :( just know you are gonna make it so far in this world, dont let your guard down because I know you can strive towards anything, listen to me, im proud of you, and happy you exist with such a bright soul, and im sorry everything goes to shit around you trying to dim that light. You are amazing.
ButterbowlXD
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P̶o̶v̶:̶ you can't afford Therapy
Reasons why i hate life and myself: everybody hates me, i don't know how to communicate, i want everyone just to know what i want, one day maybe someone will love me, My boyfriend is really busy, i don't wanna do anything, I'm so selfish that i want everything to go my way, My favorite youtuber hasn't posted in a long time, my friends don't like me, only atleast 4 of my friends actually have talked to me, I just wanna kill myself, life will be better with me gone, one day maybe someone will love me, I hate everything about myself, maybe i should just end it, i'v ebeen feeling suicidal, I feel so lonely, I won't be able to get through anyhing, i'm too sensitive, Maybe i should end it all, i dislike everything, maybe one day i get to figure out what everyone wants from me, i can't talk properly, i haven't socialized, i only obsess over things i like, i'm so selfish, please, this is serious, I should end it all, sure. lets go write a suicided note, no one would care, no one would even read it. i should go delete myself from this world, i don't matter. i practically am just a mistake, No one should appreciate being around me. No. one. loves. or. likes. me.
I
keep
getting
told
kill
your
self
I can't even spell right, i should dropout, no your too young, this is me talking to myself. i want to runaway. no i need to runaway.. i'm way too lonely, i wish someone can understand me
reasons why i live life and myself: ..
if you've made it this far through my vent.. i'm sorry if this triggered you.. I'm sorry..
letter count:1548
xxJakeWebber
@ButterbowlXD dont take yourself out for the people and things around you that try so hard to tear you away and burden you. I believe in u.
xxJakeWebber
@ButterbowlXD i care, you are truly an extraordinary person. I love you, and dont let anyone or anything take that feeling away, its engraved inside of u even if u feel hopeless. You are loved and worthy of feeling loved. You are cherished.
xxJakeWebber
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@ButterbowlXD You are no where near selfish. You are so incredibly important to this world and future of the world. The world is nothing without your existence, life might treat u like shit and make you feel like it's all your fault but I promise you it isnt and never will be your fault. Im so sorry you have to carry all this burden with you, you dont deserve this. You arent too sensitive, you are human, and I can see you are very broken.. its so hard to find hope or light in your life especially with these circumstances, dont let anyone disregard you and how you feel. You are right, this is serious, but i need you to know you arent alone, even if you feel so, theres always someone or something around the corner waiting at the right moment to be the light you need. I can never say "hey it will get better" flat out or "im sorry" because the context needs to make sense, i need you to know when you are broken its hard to put your pieces back together alone.. you need someone or something to help you stay together, and the fact youve felt so alone breaks my heart a lot. I legit will do anything to flip a switch and make it better for you. Please stay strong, I cant tell you to do that for anyone but yourself, you are capable and amazing in every way possible. And just so you know, I am here for you. If you ever need to talk or anything you can say it, I will listen, and I will never in any way try to convince you anything negative ever, cause you are truly special, again I apologize on behalf of the world, I may not be able to fix everything, but i can most definitely heal a bit of your heart and mind with these words. I love uuu /p
ButterbowlXD
Life update:.. Been feeling better.. well, a tiny bit.. an atom sized bit
ButterbowlXD
happy pride! I'v ecome out the closet about 2 or 3 years ago! yet my parent ssay 'its just a phase' IT ISN'T