Blueberryhead0
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Hello everyone, I just want to talk about something personal and it's the reason why I've been on a long hiatus for a while. I've been not feelong the best, energy levels low and I have a friend who is on su!c!de watch and I want to be there for him every step and want him to feel like he has a place in this world and yes he's talking to a therapist and he doesn't have much people to vent to and I'm the lucky few who know, his parents down really like him and call him a mistake and everything is down hill for him and I going through something similar and I'm not asking for someone to vent, just wanted to let out some steam and some stuff that has been burdening me for a while now and I wish everything would just be alright. Will I still make stories? I am not sure as this place is just sorta cringe as I look back on it and I do wish to return but where do I start? I've gotten to the point where everything is a dead end, the endless amounts of stress is slowly eating away on my creativity until there's nothing but dust and my thoughts, the sleepless nights and the thought of my friend commiting su!c!de haunts me and I don't know what to do, watcjing Matpat's video about _Boisvert made me feel like I was the main character in the world of _Boisvert, alone, sad and sees his life like a loop and I can relate to it, but I'm only human and still very young and I never have a moment to ever recenter my thoughts. What is going on in my life? Shit is happening and the unbearable amount of failure that pains me as I can't let go of the past easily and I really wish I could but the chains that hold me back are far too strong for me to break out of and keep me in like a dungeon that no sound can come in or exit and probably no one is gonna really care about this but I wish and I know there's gotta be atleast one person out there who cares, who helps, the starman out there pure of heart.
BIG_FLOPA
this message may be
offensive
@Blueberryhead0 You are going through a lot of serious shit I see.. It's always hard and scary to think that the friend that you knew is suicidal and don't want to live anymore... I can relate in some sort? I had a rough time in middle school and thought of ending all that.. but I always had that voice in myself that always told me:"this is not an option" and let me be straight alright? The depression will not leave, you can fight depression but it will just come back eventually, I am sorry if this didn't make a lot of sense but I tried to talk something out because seeing that everyone is not responding to you just make me wanna to talk to you.
