Avakateshow2015

Which story 

YannaJenae

@Avakateshow2015 all of them love your stories more plz
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YannaJenae

Bluemoonkitty thank advice from Avakates wrighting because yours it totes boring and which you need advice she might miss some proper grammar thats what makes her stories cool more exciteing and epic she has that pop of color she has pop words on the other hand your is boring zzzzZZZZZZZ you make me snore

BlueMoonKitty10

why did you put BlueMoonKitty and there needs to be a description, kk?

BlueMoonKitty10

@BlueMoonKitty10 you did better, but the only three problems are that you need to stay on script, say a person was doing a story only about the market, (She went to the market and found a bike she rode it home) that would change the script from markets to bikes. The second problem is that you didn't describe the setting, like if someone said, (He took that ball) you could change it to (Jacob stole that green ball outside the house). The third problem is still punctuation, if someone wrote a story saying, ( Hey there my name is kate . So how is the weather . ) the first thing is quotation marks " ", put these at the front and back of someone saying something, like this ( " Hello Ariel, how are you? ") next she didn't capitalize her name, you know how to capitalize so I won't teach U. next, she put a space then a period then a space, do it like this next time, ( Polly walked to the store. ) So in conclusion, the sentence will now look like this, (  " Hey there, my name is Kate. So, how is the weather? "  )
            This is to help you not to discourage you! :D
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BlueMoonKitty10

@BlueMoonKitty10 don't forget to take away BlueMoonKitty
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