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Y'know i think i forgot the acc exists wow

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Hi, queen of panicked gays here
          
          Why, why would you betray me like this and introduce me to two gorgeous specimen at the same time just to watch me fuck up,
          
          Why would you do this to me ?
          
          The answer because its funny does NOT count btw

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Fuck
          
          I finally figured out why most people avoid my group of friends, we're so weird.
          
          Lucy drives a tractor to school
          
           Maisie calls timothy chalamet timothy shamalamdingdong
          
          Eli once smoked soap
          
          Tom is an alcoholic gay magnet (he literally attracts gays, idk what it is but they all find him hot)
          
          Eddy plans to start a cult made up of clones and rule the world (he originally wanted to asexually reproduce and brainwash people to look after his clones and train the as some sort of secret service that would overthrow the government)

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Akdjhjsj
          
          My mum was doing puzzles and she said 'a wizard puts nine cats in a magic cicle...'
          
          But my dumbass thought she said 'winchester puts nine cats in a tragic squirtle...'
          
          Whats wrong with me

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I am cursed.
          
          I was watching youtube videos of savage tumblr posts (don't ask) and you know that electronic male voice that reads the stuff out when there is no voice over? And you know the inner voice when you read?
          
          Now everyfuckingthing i read sounds like that one electronic souless dude is speaking it into my head.

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Y'know that one kid who everyone is scared of because the have all the blackmail. Ye, thats me.
          
          (What they don't know is they added me to the group chat by accident and that is where all the tea is spilt. It was so long ago an I'm so inactive they forgot I'm there and now i just lurk at 3 in the morning and read all the messages that they sent so i can seem super mysterious and scary the next day.)
          
           Is it bad for me to take joy in watching them sweat uncomfortably because the know that somehow i know?