hi friends! thought I'd pop by with an update considering I've more or less fallen off the face of the earth and I figured it makes sense to cue you in or where my thoughts are at
so, here's the thing, I'm currently sat on a story ready to go live any second (it has been for more than a while) BUT I've also spent months and months and months (friends I've pestered about their opinions will know) thinking about my future as a writer and whether I want that future (and the now) to be tied to this platform. I've had to turn down some things along the way simply because I don't know if I want to have a presence here in a week or a month or in six months or in a year. part of me, a BIG part of me loves this place and never ever thought a day would come where I'd consider not wanting to share my writing here, but there's this other part of me that's gotten quite comfortable with writing out of the eyes of the public. not only that but I've also allowed myself to dream bigger, maybe reaching for goals outside of this space, and I'm not sure if this is where I want to be until I may reach that point. I think also, in all honesty, I've become more protective of my work which also means more hesitant to deal with potential risks included in putting it up on the internet. ALL IN ALL, I know nothing, I'm very indecisive and only today I've been about to press the 'publish' button on said story more than ten times—it's honestly become a bit of a daily routine.
this probably helped no one but because of your huge part in my confidence of a writer, I wanted you to know that I *do* have lots of stories and ideas I want to share with you, I just have to make sure I don't do anything I regret.
if you read all my rambling, cheers and lots of love. I hope you're doing good, I am! now I'm off to watch daisy jones & the six! I'll keep you posted on whatever I choose to do next <3