Hetalia Fairy Tales

Rapunzel Part 1

There were once a man, Antonio, and a woman,

Me: oh Romano!

Romano: but I don't want to be married to the tomato bastard or any ducking asshole's mom!

Me: *turns him into a girl* moving on!

Nyo Romano: Admin!

Lovina, who had long in vain wished for a child. At length, Lovina hoped that God was about to grant her desire. These people had a little window at the back of their house from which a splendid garden could be seen, which was full of the most beautiful flowers and herbs. It was, however, surrounded by a high wall, and no one dared to go into it because it belonged to an enchantress

Me: France!

France: I don't want to be his mom!

England: I don't want to be the frog's kid either!

France: Do I look like a sheep!? I mean... it would make sense if I was Rapunzel, he were the enchantress.

England: you wanker!

Me: enough! *turns France into a girl*

Francine, who had great power and was dreaded by all the world.

Nyo France: non! I'm loved by all the world.

England: in your prevented dreams maybe!

Nyo France: black sheep of Europe!

England: stop saying that! *strangles her*

Me: would you both stop! We barely even finished the first paragraph!

One day Lovina was standing by this window and looking down into the garden, when she saw a bed which was planted with the most beautiful rampion -

Me: *turns England into a girl quickly* onward!

Nyo England: oh come on! I should still get a say!

Alice, and it looked so fresh and green that she longed for it, and had the greatest desire to eat some. This desire increased every day, and as she knew that she could not get any of it, she quite pined away, and began to look pale and miserable.
Then her husband was alarmed, and asked, "What ails you, dear wife?"

Everyone: This is so totally Spain.

Spain:.... sí...

"Ah," she replied, "if I can't eat some of the rampion, which is in the garden behind our house, I shall die."
Antonio, who loved her, thought, sooner than let your wife die, bring her some of the rampion yourself, let it cost what it will. At twilight, he clambered down over the wall into the garden of the enchantress Francine, hastily clutched a handful of rampion, and took it to his wife. She at once made herself a salad of it, and ate it greedily. It tasted so good to her - so very good, that the next day she longed for it three times as much as before. If he was to have any rest, Antonio must once more descend into the garden. In the gloom of evening, therefore, he let himself down again. But when he had clambered down the wall he was terribly afraid, for he saw the enchantress Francine standing before him.
"How can you dare," said she with angry look, "descend into my garden and steal my rampion like a thief? You shall suffer for it."
"Ah," answered Antonio, "let mercy take the place of justice, I only made up my mind to do it out of necessity. My wife saw your rampion from the window, and felt such a longing for it that she would have died if she had not got some to eat."
Then Francine allowed her anger to be softened, and said to him, "If the case be as you say, I will allow you to take away with you as much rampion as you will, only I make one condition, you must give me the child which your wife will bring into the world. It shall be well treated, and I will care for it like a mother."

Nyo England: kill me now.

Nyo France: non! You shall be my child!

Nyo England: *groan*

Me: I thought...

Nyo France: I get to boss her around.

Antonio in his terror consented to everything, and when Lovina was brought to bed, Francine appeared at once, gave the child the name of Alice, and took it away with her.

Nyo Romano: I don't care if she's England! You do not just get to take my kid! Bastard!

Spain: Remember Romano this just a fairytale.

Nyo Romano: I don't care! Damn it!

Alice grew into the most beautiful child under the sun. When she was twelve years old, Francine shut her into a tower, which lay in a forest, and had neither stairs nor door, but quite at the top was a little window. When Francine wanted to go in, she placed herself beneath it and cried,
"Alice, Alice,
Let down your hair!"
Alice had magnificent long hair, fine as spun gold, and when she heard the voice of the enchantress Francine she unfastened her braided tresses, wound them round one of the hooks of the window above, and then the hair fell twenty ells down, and Francine climbed up by it.

Nyo France: no like the picture. Yuck.

After a year or two, it came to pass that the king's son, Alfred, rode through the forest and passed by the tower.

America: the hero has arrived!

Germany and Nyo England: *face palm*

Then he heard a song, which was so charming that he stood still and listened. This was Alice, who in her solitude passed her time in letting her sweet voice resound. Alfred wanted to climb up to her, and looked for the door of the tower, but none was to be found. He rode home, but the singing had so deeply touched his heart, that every day he went out into the forest and listened to it. Once when he was thus standing behind a tree, he saw that Francine came there, and he heard how she cried,
"Alice, Alice,
Let down your hair!"
Then Alice let down the braids of her hair, and Francine climbed up to her. "If that is the ladder by which one mounts, I too will try my fortune," said he, and the next day when it began to grow dark, he went to the tower and cried,
"Alice, Alice,
Let down your hair!"