youfatmotherfvcker

How do parents have the insane ability to embarrass you ten separate times in front of guests within a 30 minute period?

Alexaisere

@youfatmotherfvcker 30? We are talking about fifteen 
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oomiezoomies

that is why i stay in my room and have a draw of snacks 
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youfatmotherfvcker

JFC, uggghhhh. I can’t believe we’re back with this bull again. 
          
          Please read this!! And spread the word!!! Please please please be SAFE. 
          https://my.w.tt/ERhh0tuyP7

the_bisexual_stag

@youfatmotherfvcker  its walmart mickey on drugs
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retrozouis

@youfatmotherfvcker YES THIS TOO, I FORGOT TO TALK ABOUT THIS
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Grays_Graphics

*which*
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ukiyoplural

WOMB NUGGET I UNDERSTAND YOU'RE PROBALY BUSY RIGHT NOW BUT CAN I JUST SAY PLEASE STAY SAFE THERE'S THIS WHOLE BLUE WHALE CHALLENGE COMING BACK SO PLEASE DON'T ACCEPT ANY CHALLENGES OK!?

youfatmotherfvcker

WAIT WHAT WHATS BLUE WHALE AND DONT WORRY!! I WONT TAKE ANY STUPID CHALLENGES!! 
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youfatmotherfvcker

I really hate it when my upstairs neighbours walk around their house because I can hear every single loud footstep and as they walk and the fvcking floorboards creak so it always sounds like someone is out to kill me. 
          
          On another note, my toaster is emulating smoke. Should I be worried? 

zoliz961

Thanks for the follow if it's not a problem with you can you check out my books and also like and comment on it 

youfatmotherfvcker

There’s something scary about finding out that someone you’re close with has Wattpad. 
          
          Because then you feel forced to tell them you have it too. Then you discover that they only use it for reading the proper shxt, and then they read your page and see that it’s literally just fan-fiction. 
          
          I’m really sorry Den. 
          
          

Stylinson_Freak

@youfatmotherfvcker- Yeah, but it's cool because neither one of us know each other's name on here.
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youfatmotherfvcker

@Stylinson_Freak well that is terrifying. 
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youfatmotherfvcker

My mums still not back from the shops, that either means she’s been kidnapped/killed or she’s found out how time travel worked and decided to leave me behind while she, my sister and my dad travel in the past and stop my past dad from impregnating my mum. 
          
          If I cease to exist in the next 20 seconds, don’t say I didn’t warn you. 

youfatmotherfvcker

@Alexaisere One word: Flash
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Alexaisere

@youfatmotherfvcker but for real now, time travel would be possible if we were able to be faster then light, and the only reason it’s not happening is because people can’t figure out how to be faster than light. Thank you.
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Alexaisere

@youfatmotherfvcker Oh no!!! Someone save her!
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