PH1LZ4M1N3CR4FT

Why are my kids trying to tell me I don’t have a wife?

moltchan-o

@PH1LZ4M1N3CR4FT 
          	  
          	  you don't have a wife tho
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-ZoneWilbur

@PH1LZ4M1N3CR4FT ♪ you dont???
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-T0MMYINNIT

you don't
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PH1LZ4M1N3CR4FT

How to stop my teenage son from eating mud

crowfather-o

@PH1LZ4M1N3CR4FT i have no clue. you can try saying that you'll ground him if he eats mud? or something 
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-DR4AM

If you need a hand, just ask.
            
            Sincerely, Dream
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-DR4AM

Murder him.
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-ZoneWilbur

Dear Dad (who may or may not have killed me) 
          
          hi :)
          
          love, your son who you TOTALLY didnt MURDER with my own SWORD <3333

-ZoneWilbur

@PH1LZ4M1N3CR4FT ♪ hi dad!!
            
            It's ok,,,
            
            love, your MURDERED som
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PH1LZ4M1N3CR4FT

@-ZoneWilbur Hello Wilbur! Not too sure what you’re referring too.. Love, Philza.
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PH1LZ4M1N3CR4FT

Why are all my kids taller than me?

-ZoneWilbur

au where technoblade kills me instead of u