The Uncle Horace Munro

I am sure that, a long time ago, fate decided that the moment I set eyes on my uncle I should hate him; and I did, I do and I always shall do. I had never met a fouler man. It was sod's law that my parents' untimely and downright inconvenient death should lead to my living with my uncle. I was sure that my uncle could not be any viler. Oh, how wrong I was.

A warning to those who haven't the acquired taste of a morbid sense of humour.