Description
📄 Series Description (In Voice of Lord Stabs-a-Lot): > Hello Future Fans, Critics, and Possibly My Parole Officer! I am Lord Stabs-a-Lot, Grandmaster of Gentle Mishaps and Self-Appointed Archbishop of the Rotting West Wing. This is my journal, memoir, opera script, spiritual weather report, and emergency confession - all written with enthusiasm and suspicious fluids. What you hold is not just a story. It is an expression of joy, like laughter during surgery, or singing during an exorcism. I lived in a lovely white hotel full of thoughtful restraints, whispering lights, and people who mistook teeth for currency. Then, of course, the invitations came - some were written in blood, others simply screamed in the hallway - and so our adventure began. We made art. We made messes. We made decisions. I wrote it all down, in case reality ever comes back and wants an explanation. If you're here for meaning, you might find something. If you're here for structure, bring glue. If you're here by accident... don't tell the nurses. Yours in enthusiasm, Lord Stabs-a-Lot (Knight of the Unhinged Order, Professional Hug Dealer, Former Anatomy Puzzle Champion) --------------- ⚠️ Disclaimer (From Lord Stabs-a-Lot Himself): Everything in this book is fictional. Especially the parts that feel too specific. All characters, events, names, anatomical stunts, and emotional confetti are completely made up and not based on anyone living, dead, or melting. This book contains absurdist horror, dark comedy, disturbing imagery, and cheerful violence told from the perspective of someone who probably should not be allowed pens. Reader discretion is advised. Especially if you're made of meat.
🩸 Diary Entry #42: "Tuesday Was a Meat Day"
