First Marriage

I got married for first time. Lost into the depth of agony and despair.
I no longer believe in love and romance.
Will I ever able to come out of the deep,dark,hopeless blackhole in my life??
Will I ever experience the true essence of love ??
Do I still need to believe something called love?? Is it really exist in this word? ?

Then I got married again. Has my life changed ? Or is it gonna be the same like before??!!!!!!