Pick-up lines

You're a sad loser of many dares where your crush Captain Ackerman is at the frustrating end of the jokes. He could have killed you a while ago though, so why does he put up with you?
Gender neutral reader.

(Slices of life with the Recon Corps when they have less on their mind, all humour-oriented for a light and simple-minded read)

Chapters can be read individually unless said otherwise.

*Not beta'd, wished it was though.