Elnaron
By Erebos_128
2
0
0
  • Fantasy
  • friendship
  • magic
  • school

Description

This can not yet be considered a book. I just wrote the first chapter and I'd really like to have some feedback. Feel free to comment on anything: plot, charas, conversations, descriptions, grammar, punctuation - just anything that you think is great, sucks or straight up boring. If anyone wants to read the story in German, just message me and I'll upload that version too. Here's a little insight into the chapter: Excited by this discovery, I entered the room. It wasn't very big, but it looked very inviting. In the center there was a large, mighty tree that blocked most of the sunlight and the rest was a meadow with some flowers I didn't recognize. Confused, I looked at the source of the sobbing. The tree was crying? However, as I walked around the tree, quite to calm my mental state, I found a rather small girl. At any rate, she looked small, for she was crouching in a little hollow and crying. The only thing I could really make out of her was her long dark brown hair. Undecided what to do now, I stared in her direction. I should probably leave her alone, I thought to myself, otherwise she wouldn't be here. But my oh-so-good conscience insisted on at least asking her how she was. I cleared my throat and moved a little closer. Because of the unexpected disturbance she looked up and stared at me with her piercing green eyes. They looked like two small dim lasers whose batteries were running out. Fear was written all over her face. "Please don't," she whispered, "it can't be..." Then she eyed me a second time, trying to blink away the tears. "You're not even...?" she stopped in mid-sentence, "of course not... how stupid of me" Still undecided what to do I asked, "I'm not even - who?"

Chapter 1

Continue Reading on Wattpad
Elnaron
by Erebos_128
2
0
0
Wattpad