The Pot and Kettle Draft one

This story is based on the song 'The Pot and Kettle' by The Rumjacks. It made me laugh so hard when I heard it that I just had to put it in literary form. This is an insult battle between two cooking utensils. I hope it makes you laugh as hard as I did while writing it.

Warning: It does contain curse words, nothing to drastic, but they are there.