Just one part: who is she?

Write your thoughts to motivate yourself & makes you feel better, but never let negative feelings "harm" you.

And remember, make du'a to Allāh is always the best solution..

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In as-Shaheehayn, Rasulullāh ﷺ said:
أيُّهَا النَّاسُ ارْبَعُوا عَلى أنْفُسكُمْ إنَّكُمْ لَيسَ تَدْ عُونَ أصَمَّ وَلاَ غَائِبًا إنّكُم تَدْ عُونَ سَمِيعًا قَرِيبًا
"O people, take it easy, for you are not calling upon One Who is deaf or absent. Verily, you are calling One Who is All-Hearing (and) Near to you."
[HR al-Bukhâri, no. 4205]
🌐https://islamqa.info/amp/en/answers/106518
🌐http://qaalarasulallah.com/hadithView.php?ID=16933
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Happy reading!