Aysu_Aga
I forced myself to close my eyes to the blinding stage lights, even when they were all I could see in the dark. I forcefully silenced the beautiful, chaotic music playing in my head, replacing it with the heavy quiet of reality. I gave up on it all-the dream of a girl group, the warmth of the fans, the adrenaline of the debut. I bowed my head, did exactly what my family demanded of me, and buried my deepest desires so far down inside my soul that I thought they would suffocate. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and lied to myself, whispering that it was finally over.
But hope... hope is a terrifyingly stubborn thing. It never asks for your permission to stay; it just nests in the darkest corners of your heart. Every single time a new girl group appears on my screen, watching their flawless success and seeing how high they have risen breaks my heart into a thousand invisible pieces. I stand there, frozen, knowing that could have been me, should have been me. Every time a spotlight flashes, every time a stray melody catches my ear, that tiny, agonizing spark ignites in my chest all over again, burning me from the inside out.
I completely stopped chasing my dream. I surrendered. But my heart ruthlessly refuses to let it go. And that is the true, inescapable prison-being hopelessly trapped between a reality that suffocates my existence every single day, and a lingering hope that refuses to let me rest in peace.